68 Corruption in the Courts

“Corruption in the Courts”
sung to the tune of
“Zombies on Your Lawn” from the game
Plants vs. Zombies

After Klavier’s touching performance of “The Guitar’s Serenade” with Juniper at the Themis Academy School Festival, the area was filled with silence, a usual thing for the former rock star whose shows were always filled with the screams of applauding fans. So in order to help liven things up, Klavier felt that this was the perfect time for him to give the people the little surprise that he and Juniper were secretly planning since her trial ended.

“Achtung, beautiful people… and Herr Forehead.” Klavier smirked as he stepped up to the microphone, effectively breaking the silence while also receiving a death glare from his courtroom rival who was standing in the audience. “I want to thank all of you for coming out here tonight… especially considering what has happened…”

The Europhile prosecutor took a deep breath as a look of sadness spread across his face.

“Professor Courte was a wonderful teacher and an even more amazing person. Half the time, it felt as though she wasn’t a teacher, but a caring mother whose only wish was to see all students reach their full potential with honesty and integrity, no matter what course they were in. So I can say with absolute certainty that even though Professor Courte never directly taught us prosecutor alums, we wouldn’t be where we are today without her. That’s why I wasn’t put in charge of bringing her murderer to justice, even though I wanted that responsibility so badly. The Chief Prosecutor wanted to be fair since another prosecutor course student who graduated with me, Herr Weinerlich, also wanted to prosecute the case for reasons similar to my own and was threatening to lock himself in his office and never ever come out if the role was given to me. But enough with this sorrow. Professor Courte wouldn’t us feeling so down, ja?”

Klavier grinned as he flipped back his hair.

“And if there was one thing Professor Courte loved more than seeing people smile, it was spreading the good word about how the end is only justified through proper means. So without further ado, take it away, Fräuline President!” The former rock star exclaimed, stepping aside so that Juniper could take his place in front of the microphone.

 {Juniper}

Hey guys!

One, two, three!

There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
Don’t want corruption in the courts.

We know their type: sinful, vile, and cruel,
Punishing the innocent to maintain their rule,
And then continue to destroy all that we hold dear,
But I was saved from that fate by my friend and her partner who’s so hunky.
They hate all that’s right,
We hate debauchery.

 {Klavier}
My friend was in my band.

 {Juniper}
In his band!

 {Klavier}
Tried to keep his crimes hidden.

 {Juniper}
Crimes hidden!

 {Klavier}
By blaming a teenage boy.

 {Juniper}
A teenage boy!

 {Klavier}
He was a villain!

 {Juniper}
There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
Don’t want corruption in the courts.

We have to take a stand and show we care.
I know that life can be hard and quite unfair,
But crimes only make the world darker.
Felons may think we lack the guts,
But they’ll soon know that’s wrong
Since we’re bettering the system with each passing minute.

 {Klavier}
My bro was a lawyer.

 {Juniper}
A lawyer!

 {Klavier}
Razed those caught up in his plans.

 {Juniper}
In his plans!

 {Klavier}
Thought the law bent to him.

 {Juniper}
Oh, no, no, no!

 {Klavier}
He was a villain!

 {Juniper}
There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
There’s corruption in the courts.
Don’t want corruption in the courts.