“It wasn’t meant to be like this!” Dick Gumshoe raked his ham-sized mitts through his unruly hair in agitation as he trekked the short path of the room for the umpteenth time. “Why does this sort of thing keep happening to her? To us?!”
“Will you cease that relentless pacing, Detective?” Miles Edgeworth crossed his arms over his chest and looked disapprovingly at his anxious subordinate over the rims of his spectacles. “You’ll wear a groove into the floor!”
The chief prosecutor grimaced and shifted slightly in his hard plastic chair.
“Not that this putrid green linoleum couldn’t withstand any sort of makeover, but I digress…”
“Only you would be commenting on the less than ideal décor surroundings at a time like this Edgeworth!” Phoenix Wright admonished his courtroom rival, shaking his head. Coming up behind Gumshoe, he clapped a sympathetic hand on the older man’s broad shoulder. “Don’t your automaton settings have a compassionate switch that can be turned on in dire straits like these?”
“Shut up, Wright!” The slate-haired man glared at the defense attorney. “I am not a robot!”
“Not at all something an actual android would say in the least!” Deadpanned the Comeback King, unable to resist mocking his best friend’s ever-unruffled nature, even during a crisis.
“Why must you be smirking like that when you say it?” Edgeworth snapped peevishly. “Just because I simply refuse to leap to the worst conclusions and join our friend in his unnecessary state of panic?”
“I can’t help it, sir!” Gumshoe cried helplessly, halting in his tracks so abruptly that the commiserating and unsuspecting Phoenix walked right into his wide back – head first. “It’s Maggey! I don’t know what I’m going to do if anything happens to her!”
“Then she’s in the right place, should anything out of the ordinary occur, seeing as how we’re in a hospital,” Edgeworth pointed out, with what even Gumshoe was starting to think was overly maddening calm. “After all, the Hickfield Clinic managed to release a man who suffered serious head trauma and a sprained ankle after merely one night’s stay a few years ago.”
“Yeah, she’s in good hands here, big guy,” the spiky-haired man added, reassuringly patting his friend on the shoulder with one hand and rubbing his sore nose, which had gotten smashed against the flatfoot’s linebacker shoulder blades, with the other. “Surely you can take comfort in Maggey having the same luck?”
“The woman I love isn’t some unbreakable superhero like you, pal!” Gumshoe slumped down into a nearby chair and buried his head in his hands. “And all of the luck she’s ever experienced has mostly been of the bad variety! There’s a reason her nickname was the goddess of misfortune!”
The Ace Attorneys exchanged an uncomfortable, knowing glance at the veracity of the words. The prosecutor cleared his throat awkwardly, uncertain of what to say next to such a statement.
“That may have been true in the past, Gumshoe,” Phoenix offered hesitantly, trying to instill some conviction into his tone. “But that was a long time ago! Surely her fortune has done a turn for the better since she met you?”
“Hardly.” Gumshoe hung his head like a dejected puppy. “It’s not like I’ve had the best experiences with Lady Luck myself! If anything, I think our collided kismets mean a double dose of tough times! Did I ever tell you about the disaster that was our first date? It was right after the whole Hazakura Temple ordeal. Maggey loves the snow since she grew up in Vermont, so I thought I’d take her on a skiing date up in Eagle Mountain.”
“Oh, dear.” Phoenix was already flinching in preparation for the tale. “Let me guess…her bad luck proceeded her, and one of you lost your sense of grace and ended up breaking a limb and ending up in the emergency room going down the bunny hill?”
“Are you kidding?” The human tank ran a hand on his face. “We didn’t even make it to the ski resort!”
Flashback
Eagle Mountain Area
February 25, 2019
“You make a terrific hot chocolate, sir!” Maggey praised as she sipped her fourth serving from the thermos cup her date had thoughtfully packed for the long car ride up to the Hazakura Temple area. “One of these days you’ll have to tell me your secret of what’s in this blend!”
“I’m glad you like it!” He blushed with pleasure at the knowledge that he had been responsible for the smile of contentment on her pretty face. “That isn’t any old store-bought powder drink mix either! It’s an old family recipe – that can only be passed down to Gumshoe’s either by blood or marriage!”
“You mean you’ll never tell me what’s in this heavenly concoction unless I become a Gumshoe?” She shifted in the passenger seat of the detective’s old battered vehicle and grinned impishly at the driver. “I guess that means you either have to marry me or adopt me, sir!”
Gumshoe cringed at the latter option, even made in jest, as any way to bequeath his family name to the woman he’d loved for so long, and shook his head.
“Since you’re no longer my subordinates on the police force, Maggey, you do know that you can now call me Dick, don’t you?”
“Oh! Silly me!” Her cheeks grew warm at the reminder that the two were together for once in a completely personal, and not all business capacity. “Of course! After all, this is a date…right?”
“Sure is.” Feeling slightly emboldened, he removed one hand off the steering wheel and playfully tugged at the pom-pom of the winter hat sitting atop her short brunette mane. “The first of many, I hope.”
“I’ll drink to that!” Maggey happily poured herself another cup of hot chocolate and raised in cheers. “To possibilities…Dick!”
“Here, here!”
He was beaming as he took a sip from the proffered mug she raised to his lips since he wasn’t able to raise his own glass to that promising toast.
The next thing he knew, Maggey had slid across the sofa-style seat and nestled up to him, gazing up at him adoringly, and he slid a strong arm around her slender shoulders, giving her a gentle squeeze while keeping the other one safely on the wheel.
Dick Gumshoe was feeling on top of the world to finally have the woman of his dreams by his side, and you couldn’t have wiped the ear-to-ear grin off his face with an ammonia-soaked sponge. This was already going better than he ever could have imagined, and they hadn’t even arrived at the destination yet!
After a few minutes though, Maggey began shifting uncomfortably beside him, and he wondered if the weight of his brawniness was becoming too much for her petite frame. Flustered, he hastily removed his arm and placed both his hands back on the wheel.
“Er, sorry,” he mumbled self-consciously. “I didn’t mean to –”
“No, no, it’s not you!” She looked away, clearly embarrassed. “I – I was enjoying that! It’s just … How far we from the ski lodge?”
“Usually it’s two hours to get to Kurain’s surrounding area, but it just started snowing hard in the last half hour so I’d say about another 30 minutes or so at least?”
“I’ll never make it!” She was officially fidgeting now and appeared downright pained. “Oh my gosh! This is so embarrassing…”
“What’s up, Maggey?” He asked worriedly, noticing she was biting her lip while crossing and un-crossing her legs. “Talk to me.”
“Nature’s calling something fierce, Dick!” Her cheeks flamed. “I don’t think I can wait that long! It’s all my fault of course, for being such a glutton with your yummy hot chocolate…”
“Do you need to go to the bathroom?” He asked, fighting back amusement at how adorable she was in attempting to mask her discomfort.
“So badly!” She eyed him pleadingly. “Do you think you could do a roadside stop, just for a minute?”
Without another word, he amiably pulled over to the side, wisely opting not to make a crass comment like ‘urine good hands!‘
“Your wish is my command, Maggey. Don’t be embarrassed – when you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go!”
“Thank you, Dick!” She pecked him on the cheek and smiled gratefully as he reached into his glove compartment to offer her some Kleenex. “I’ll be right back!”
Flinging open the passenger door, she swung her booted feet onto the ground and whistled as the snow immediately swallowed her feet and ankles nearly up to her knees.
“Wow, there’s a lot of the cold, white stuff out here! I might need an extra minute just to make my way to the back of your car for some privacy!”
“Take your time!” He called out to her, not sure if she’d heard him over the wild rush of swirling wind.
Humming to himself, he fidgeted with the dials of his car radio, trying to find some sort of romantic music station which would hopefully restore the intimate mood they’d been enjoying before this. He found himself humming along to Marvin Gaye as visions of Maggey as his winter – and hopefully year-round! – snuggle bunny danced in his head.
However, it was by the time the crooner’s “Lucky, Lucky Me” ended its second verse that he realized something was awry.
Maggey still hadn’t come back from taking care of her business!
He was officially starting to get worried.
Which seems silly because really what could possibly happen to a young woman who simply stepped outside of an armed police officer’s car for a quick moment and hadn’t ventured more than a few feet away?
Still, this was Maggey Byrde, after all!
Frowning, Gumshoe wrestled with the gentlemanly need to give his date her privacy, and his mounting concern for her well-being. Stepping out, he slowly inched towards the back of the car, relieved to see the top of her pom-pom peeking from behind his trunk area.
“Maggey?” He shuffled a bit closer, while carefully averting his gaze, lest she accused him of trying to take a peek! “Is everything OK? Um, do you need more time?”
“I relieved myself ages ago!” She sounded frantic. “That’s the least of my concerns right now!”
“What do you mean?” He carefully moved closer, while keeping his head turned away for the sake of her modesty, noticing that although much taller than her, the snow was deep enough to come mid-calf even on him. “What’s wrong? Did you get stuck in the snow? Do you need a hand?”
“I’m stuck alright!” She sounded downright hysterical now. “But not in the snow!”
“What do you mean?” Gumshoe was officially worried now. “I was fretful you’d frozen your buns off out here – but you’re telling me you’re stuck?!
“I swear this level of indignity could only happen to me!” She let out a strangled wail. “But um….yes, in a matter of speaking you could say that indeed, I am freezing my butt off …and require some immediate assistance!”
“What?!”
Gumshoe was now standing right over her. As he came around the car, she tried to cover herself with her scarf and looked up imploringly into his eyes.
As he, at last, realized just what had happened, the detective burst out laughing, and tears of mirth ran down his cheeks, which morphed into ice drops in the chilly wind. The sight instantaneously gave Maggey the giggles as well, and when they finally managed to compose themselves, the two assessed the dilemma.
When she’d stepped into the deep snow and come to the back of the car, the former waitress had quickly realized that in the required crouching position she’d need to assume to do her business, she wouldn’t have good footing, so she’d let her heinie rest against the rear fender to steady herself while she did what she had to do.
Upon finishing, however, Lady Luckless soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued to the car’s fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.
The new couple sobered as the grim reality kicked in. Obviously, as comical as the situation was, they were faced with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her
chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!
“And let me guess…” she said feebly as she caught the dismay on his face. “I drank all the hot chocolate, didn’t I?”
“I’m afraid so,” he nodded as another scarlet wave surfaced over his mug. “Our options here in the middle of nowhere, on a deserted mountain road, are sort of limited…”
Thinking about what had gotten Maggey into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. And it wouldn’t be pretty.
“You know what you need to do to get my tush off this fender… Dick.” Maggey squeezed her eyes shut and yanked her hat down over her eyes. “I think this most definitely puts any sir days long behind you!”
“I sure hope I don’t get stage-fright…” Gumshoe groaned in humiliation as he reached to undo his belt, thinking this surely deserved some sort of Nightmare First Date prize, hands down…or rather…pants down! “I’m not used to an audience…”
“I won’t look if you don’t!”
“You know, I’m not sure which one of us is a more likely candidate to die of mortification right about now!”
End Flashback
“Good grief!” Edgeworth muttered as Gumshoe finished his tale and Phoenix dissolved into fits of laughter. “Are you sure neither of you didn’t have some evil Chinese witch curse you with the words: ‘May you have interesting times’ at some point?”
The big man looked bewildered, and the defense attorney paused long enough from his merriment long enough to insert his editorial.
“Well…that sure gives the term pissed off a whole new meaning!”
Gumshoe snorted ever so slightly, then shrugged.
“Life with Maggey has never been boring. Even the first time I tried to kiss her – which took me quite some time after having a first date like that! – was unforgettable!”
“And why the delay?” Edgeworth queried. “Were you too embarrassed to look one another in the eye again after the whole initial debacle?”
“Not at all, sir! We still laugh about that one! No, we had our second date a few weeks later. Maggey tried to surprise me with a home-cooked meal – her family recipe of
muscles marinara. Unfortunately, they didn’t sit too well with me…”
Flashback
Maggey Byrde’s Place
March 5, 2019
“This is so nice!” Maggey beamed as Gumshoe helped himself to a second helping of muscles. “I’ve been wanting to have you over for dinner for some time to thank you for being such a good sport after – well you know what! This recipe has been in the Byrde family for generations – I’m so happy you like it, Dick.”
“You don’t get too many chances to afford the luxury of seafood on an honest cop’s salary,” Gumshoe acknowledged ruefully.
“Well, I made out like a bandit with some of the frozen food when that French restaurant where I worked closed down!” She chirped. “It’s not like it was stealing! Jean was only gonna throw the stuff out anyway!”
He pushed back his chair and wiped his mouth on a napkin, and Maggey excitedly tugged his arm.
“Shall we head over to the living room? The movie starts at 8!”
“I still can’t believe after all you’ve been through, you want to see a movie about cops!”
“Beverly Hills Cop is a classic, and I love Eddie Murphy! Besides, the character in there reminds me of you!”
“Really?” He settled back on the couch and wrapped an arm around her shoulders as she snuggled up against him. “I remind you of Axel Foley?”
“No silly!” She giggled and playfully tapped his nose. “You remind me of his pal Billy, the adorable bumble-butt played by Judge Reinhold!”
“Objection!” He pretended to be hurt, but she was so endearing as she grinned up at him he couldn’t even feign indignation. “I resemble that remark, missy!”
The duo watched the film in contented silence, snuggled close, and he tried to focus on the film, and not the clean, floral scent of Maggey’s shampoo, or the warmth of her body.
Or the warm rumblings beginning to stir in his belly.
He assumed they were merely nerves disguised as butterflies that were surfacing due to having the object of his affections sitting so close to him.
Frowning, he rubbed his stomach, hoped she wouldn’t notice the strange gurgling noises beginning to surface, and crossed his fingers that the feeling would soon pass.
Even though she’d seen the crime comedy many times, the suspenseful moments always made Maggey jump, just like they had the first time. At one point she nearly leaped from the sofa, but Gumshoe’s arms around her held her down, so the only thing that went flying was the bowl of popcorn in her lap, sprinkling both of them in a buttery shower. They both snickered and resumed watching the movie, with her comfortably curled up against him, when midway through, he shifted and started wiggling around.
She didn’t think anything of his sudden shuffling, figuring he may be trying to brush straight kernels out from beneath him, but then leaned towards her with a look on his face she’d never seen before. She eagerly tilted her face towards his, assuming he was finally about to make a move….until he started making weird grunting sounds!
She opened her eyes wide, confusion stamped across her face. Gumshoe had never been the romantic, Romeo sort but surely even he had to know that making constipated moose noises was hardly a mood enhancer!
He finally used all his might and shoved her off of him, then blurted, “You’re leaning on my stomach, Maggey, can please you get off?”
Maggey was beyond embarrassed to realize she had been shoving her arm into his gut for support the entire time!
However, he didn’t look at all relieved now that she had removed her weight from him. If anything he now looked slightly green.
“Dick, what’s wrong?” She asked quickly. “Are you feeling alright?”
“I don’t know.” A thin sheen of sweat broke out on his forehead. “My stomach doesn’t feel too good…what was in those muscles?”
“Nothing I’d think you wouldn’t like!” A feeling of dread filled her. “Just garlic, tomatoes, white wine, basil, parsley…”
“H – how did you cook them?” He staggered to his feet, and she placed an anxious hand on his face, noting he felt cold and clammy. “What method?”
“Well, you steam them until they open…” she said slowly. “My mother used to use fresh ones, of course, but frozen ones seemed tricky so …”
“Are you telling me some of them didn’t open?” Gumshoe croaked, grabbing his mid-section. “M-Maggey…didn’t you check to see?”
“I was so nervous about cooking for you, I didn’t eat dinner,” she confessed miserably. “I was so worried about the presentation to make the muscles just like they do in fancy restaurants, I may have overlooked a few…”
“But if the muscles don’t fully become ajar…” The hulking detective was outright swaying in place now. “You can get…”
The rest of his words were lost as he immediately dove his head into the nearby empty popcorn container on the coffee table.
“…food poisoning.” Maggey gasped in horror, rubbing his back as he continued to heave into the bowl. “Oh Dick, I’m so sorry!”
“I need the bathroom!” He panted, raising his head at last and stumbling down the hall. “If anyone here is sorry, it’s me! This isn’t going to be pretty…apologies in advance to your plumbing as I need to pay a different kind of homage now to the porcelain God…”
End Flashback
“Thus ends the story of how dinner, as the encore presentation to movie night – came up and took a bow?” Phoenix snorted, earning a withering glare from the stern prosecutor, who was nowhere near as amused. Seafood was something the debonair attorney took far too seriously to ever laugh at!
“For the love of all that is holy!” Edgeworth was rubbing his temples as his friend finished telling the tale. “Why is it the Red Cross doesn’t follow you two menaces around day and night?!”
“Lighten up, Edgeworth!” Phoenix grinned. “At least these stories tell a bigger tale of love through adversity!”
“No kidding, pal! We’d been dating almost two months before I tried to kiss her,” Gumshoe remembered fondly, smiling at the memory. “To the surprise of absolutely nobody here, I suppose it’s needless to say that was an event in itself which can never be forgotten as well…”
Flashback
Gatewaterland
April 27, 2019
I’d walk a million miles one of those smiles, Gumshoe grinned to himself as Maggey lovingly squeezed the huge Blue Badger doll he’d won for her at the rifle shooting game as they exited the theme park. It was worth every penny of my hard-earned money to put that look on her sweet face! Who knew that donating blood could prove to be a lucrative gig to serve as extra date funds? I judge myself for not thinking of it sooner!
“I can’t wait to get this fella home – he’s joining me in bed and will rest beside my pillow, so I can be reminded of you every night!” Maggey said happily, leaning over to take a bite from his cotton candy. “It’s just another sign of your understated creative genius that you were part of the development team in creating this guy, Dick!”
“Mr. Edgeworth might disagree with your thoughts about the little guy, since he referred to it as a wriggling piece of plywood,” Gumshoe chuckled good-naturedly. “Different strokes for different folks I guess!”
“Even genius prosecutors can’t be right all the time!” She stated loyally. “I happen to think he’s as adorable as the man who created him!”
Gumshoe felt bashful pride coursing through him, along with a wave of affection so strong he could no longer contain himself.
They’d just exited the park and were about to step out onto the side road, but he paused mid-stride and placed a hand on Maggey’s arm, and stared deeply into her eyes, unaware of the danger looming on the horizon.
All he knew was that he could no longer go another moment without expressing his feelings for her.
Just as he began to lean forward though, Maggey’s eyes went wild, as she saw the hazard coming towards them before he did.
“Gah! That maniac! Dick! Look out!”
“What the…”
Without warning, she flung her tiny frame in front of his, like a human shield, dropping her cherished stuffed animal to the ground and raising an arm to protect his head – just as an enormous Steel Samurai Dog truck, complete with oversized Styrofoam wiener and bun atop the roof – blindly sped past them, narrowly missing the couple by inches.
Expelling a huge sigh of relief, Maggey tugged his hand and pulled him back up to the safety of the curb before bending over to retrieve the fallen Blue Badger.
It was when she turned to face him again that she finally spotted the blood…which was all over his face and trench coat!
“Sweet, merciful crap!” She clapped a horrified hand to her mouth. “D –Dick! You’re bleeding!”
“I believe that would be my nose.” He shrugged, casually reaching into his pocket and blotting away the crimson droplets with a handkerchief. “Looks like you accidentally elbowed me in the schnoz during your heroic frenzied efforts to rescue me from becoming car-meat at the hands of a crazed, out-of-control Weenie-Mobile!”
“I did this to you?!” She felt tears welling up in her eyes as she raised a trembling hand to his face. “I –I’m so sorry! Is it broken?”
“A little.” Utterly unfazed, he studied his reflection in her spectacles, placed his fingers on the sides of his nose, and moved it back into place with a resounding popping sound. “Ah! There we go – good as new! Hurt like the dickens, but sure beats becoming road-kill!”
She started crying then. Silent tears, but hot, large ones. They were accompanied by body-heaving sobs, and he immediately became alarmed.
“Maggey, what’s wrong?” He peered into her downcast face. “Hey – don’t be upset! No worries about my nose – I’m a cop! I’ve broken various body parts in the line of duty more times than I can count!”
Ignoring his words, the tears continued to fall even faster now.
“Maggey, please, talk to me!” He begged, shaking her shoulder gently. She shrugged his hand away and wrapped both arms around her plush doll, her petite frame shaking.
The sight of her tear-streaked face was more painful than any injury he’d ever sustained, so the poor man tried to take the comical route to lighten the mood.
“Please don’t be upset! You saved my life! Moreover, you spared me from suffering the undignified post-mortem headline: Pig Meats Untimely End or Dick Gets Plowed by Magnum Weiner!”
“How can you make jokes at a time like this?” She sobbed, finally raising liquid brown eyes to meet his confused dark ones. “I fail to see the humor of this situation! Thanks to my usual clumsiness, you’ve now got blood all over your coat!”
“Where?” He glanced down at his dirty jacket and shrugged again. “This one here? That’s not blood – it’s raspberry jelly from the donut I had last night! This coat’s had more than its share of war wounds – even if there is some sort of blood on it, I’ll just take it to the dry cleaners with my next paycheck! Or just consider it part of my badge of honor collection from the line of duty!”
“Why are you making light of all this, Dick?” She cried plaintively. “If you stick with me, you’ll end up being buried in that damn thing – because I’ll somehow end up being your cause of demise!”
The words shocked him, and he stared at her speechlessly.
“At the very least, you’ll end up in the Emergency Ward of the hospital because of me!” She continued dismally, hanging her head. “I –I’m the Goddess of Misfortune! You need to get out now and save yourself while you still can! It’s the story of my life – my bad luck doesn’t just affect me, but everyone I love!”
Normally Gumshoe would have been elated by the telling detail she’d just let slip out, but the self-loathing woman wasn’t anywhere near done lambasting herself yet.
“Dick, what the devil are you even doing with me?” She wailed helplessly, staring up at him with lachrymose eyes, reddened from weeping. “In the past two months alone, I’ve forced you to degrade yourself by dropping your pants – and not even in the fun way! – and risk losing a major certain body part to frostbite in trying to save my behind – literally! I’ve then proceeded to repay your heroic kindness by nearly killing you with food poisoning, and now, in trying to rescue you right back, I’ve made you stain the new trench coat that I bought you myself…and mangled your face!”
“Maggey, you’re being crazy!” Gumshoe insisted haplessly, wishing he knew what to say that would comfort her. “There’s no way in hell I’m going to let your negative self-beliefs keep me away from the sweetest, warmest, most wonderful woman I’ve ever known! I risk life and death every day being a homicide detective! So nothing you say is going to scare me away, you hear me, Margaret Charity Byrde?”
“Then you’re a fool, Richard Colombo Gumshoe!” She shouted desperately, dissolving into another fit of tears. “Because you know I can’t stay away from you, either! So all you’ve done is seal your own fate!”
For a split second, his courage almost failed him. But then he bit his lip and bent forward. Reaching out with unsteady fingers, he gently slid the glasses off of her puffy, tear-stained face, then briefly hesitated. Taking in a steadying breath, he dropped his gaze to see…her closed eyelids and saw that she was breathing heavily and unevenly. He smiled in surprise and, suddenly, her lids snapped open. His heart leaped and he felt the air escape from his lungs.
Maggey’s orbs were like sunbaked soil, pale even though they were brown. Even when during a moment of teary, emotional upheaval, there was a steadfast gentleness, as if there were a kindness that flowed from them, reassuring, beautiful.
Even while he reveled at the sight, Gumshoe found his large hand caressing her temple, and then he couldn’t wait anymore, and his palm was on the back of her head, and then his lips were on hers, the cool springtime air gone and replaced with the warmth of her mouth, tasting like spun sugary sweetness.
He opened his eyes and his free hand touched the skin of her face and realized he had never before had a first kiss with a girl he loved. He knew she knew how he felt too.
His unspoken love was in the kiss itself.
When they parted, he smiled bashfully, and whispered, “Wow,” and then she laughed and pulled him back toward her.
This time, there was no thought, no word. Maggey simply found her eyes closing again as his soft lips met hers once more. Her heart pounded in her chest while his hand found its way into her hair. She kissed him with every drop of emotion that had pooled within her – since she couldn’t even remember when! She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, and he pulled her closer to him.
Luck or misfortune be damned.
Dick Gumshoe, I’d rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else. I’d rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself. I’d rather have hard times together than to have it easy apart. I’d rather have the one who holds my heart.
End Flashback
“And she never brought up her bad luck again!” Gumshoe finished merrily, smiling widely as he concluded the tale.
“Only you two…” Edgeworth declared, who was now practically rubbing a hole into his temple. “Could have an unspoken avowal of love exchanged for the first time – while one of you had dried blood on their face and the other one had just had an emotional breakdown!”
“Quit raining on their parade, Edgeworth!” Phoenix admonished his friend. “I think their courtship has actually been really cute!”
“You would, oh Trite one!” The prosecutor grumbled disgustedly. “Although I suppose if I were big on romantic sentiment, I’d agree that, scattered within some of the more cringe-worthy details, all these against-all-odds moments have the makings of a touching love story!”
“We’ve had such a bumpy road on our path to trying to be together!” Gumshoe sighed morosely and slumped in his seat. “I’d always hoped our love would shelter us both from the storm of misfortune that’s often plagued us, but …now you guys see you see why I’m freaking out now about her unexpectedly winding up here? What if the worst does happen – not to me like she’d always feared, but to her? What if…”
“Dick Gumshoe?” A woman’s voice called just then.
“That’s me!” The big man bolted out of his chair and sprinted up to the nurse who’d entered the visitor’s lounge, and began rambling nervously. “I’m Detective Gumtree! Er, Suede Shoes! I mean…”
“This is Detective Gumshoe,” Phoenix cut in, smiling at the woman in a white cap and uniform and giving his friend a little shove as the nurse nodded brusquely and began walking away, obviously expecting to be followed.
“Come with me,” she instructed when it seemed Gumshoe was content to remain cemented in place. “Mrs. Gumshoe has been asking for you.”
“She has?” That got his feet moving. “Is she – is she gonna be OK?”
The nurse studied his pensive face and fearful eyes, and her expression softened.
“Even though it was a slightly complicated breech delivery, and the baby came about 6 weeks early, your wife is doing fine, Detective,” she said gently, ushering him into the maternity room where a drowsy Maggey was sitting upright in the bed, a tiny blanketed bundle cradled against her breast. “And your son as well.”
The nurse silently excused herself from the room to offer them privacy as the visibly relieved man walked up to the bed.
“We did it, Dick,” Maggey whispered, a tired but loving smile on her face. “Gordy is finally here.”
Gumshoe swallowed the lump of emotion in his throat as he placed a tender kiss on his wife’s lips, then leaned down and gently dropped another peck on the apple-sized head of the sleeping infant in her arms, his chest ready to burst with unmitigated joy.
“Welcome, little man.” A lone tear rolled down his cheek. “We’ve been waiting for you.”
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