22 Wright Under The Skye

Wright Talent Agency – April 20, 2026

The thoroughly drained Phoenix collapsed onto the small couch on the lower level of the Wright Talent Agency and let out a long-suffering groan.

Thank God, it’s all over now. Today was hopefully the final bogus murder rap I’ll ever need to beat … Third time’s the charm, right? All I can say is revenge is a dish best served cold. Now I no longer need to worry about anything beyond the indignity of playing fake pianist in Boris’ little slice of Siberia for peanuts! After today, there’s at least some consolation in knowing I never again need to withstand any more harrowing visits resulting in not so-latent, homoerotic encounters from that deviant, depraved Arschloch – which drive me to attempt to drink myself blind! – Ever again!

The dispirited poker champ’s overwhelmed mind was swarming with thoughts of his diabolical German adversary finally being served what had been a long time coming to him. Despite having dodged the gallows for Zak Gramarye’s – no, Shadi Smith’s murder – it was hard to feel any sort of true celebratory joy.

Unlike when he’d lost his badge, being not being found guilty of allegations he was innocent of now seemed naught but a hollow victory. This was feasibly because his brain refused to cease replaying the frightening scene of the blond psychopath’s mini-breakdown on the witness stand when Apollo Justice had finally proven his fiendish employer’s guilt.

Kristoph Gavin.

The ominous defense lawyer, with his glacial eyes and disingenuous offers of friendship, was the same dark penumbra who’d tormented Phoenix’s very existence these past seven years. Moreover, Kristoph’s very presence had forever filled the former Ace Attorney with an eerie sense of inexplicable unease every time they’d met up. He was now positive, beyond a shadow of a doubt, (yet without a shred of irrefutable evidence or an inkling of motive), that The Coolest Defense in the West was also the very party who was responsible for getting him disbarred.

Regardless of having proof or not, Phoenix hadn’t despised another human being this much since that other duplicitous sonofabitch, Matt Engarde. He was unaccustomed to feeling any sort of bitterness or hatred towards anyone, but this time, it couldn’t be helped.

I was raised in love and peace, taught to show grace and forgive, but when my mind turns to you, Kristoph, none of it is there. You knew what you were doing. I’ve suffered all this time, and you drank it like a fine wine, becoming intoxicated on your own power. All I feel is bitterness and with each passing year, it grows like a tumor, pushing on the side of me that was serene, enveloping me in toxic darkness. I’m not saying I wouldn’t spit if your eyebrows were on fire… I’m merely not claiming that I wouldn’t whip out the marshmallows!

At least there was some solace in knowing the feeling was mutual. Despite not having any inkling as to why, to have gone to such extremes, Kristoph obviously hated the fallen ex-attorney, as well.

After all, one didn’t usually try to frame someone whom they adored for murder!

That loathing factor notwithstanding, based on the German’s up close and personal visit at The Borscht Bowl five days ago (which had resulted in the pianist experiencing a near fate worse than death with Wendy Oldbag, brief, albeit sublime ecstasy with Dee Vasquez, and then excruciating degradation due to the elephant memory-laden Suhkdeep Mann) it was obvious the twisted serpentine Scheißkerl would have had few objections to screwing Phoenix.

And not just the figurative but literal sense! His tainted hoodie was proof of that!

The worst part is, I don’t even think the creepy German sausage is even gay! No more than his prosecutor sibling! Klavier – Gah! First my mortifying make-out mishap with the pretty boy rocker, and then I’m the fantasy man candy of his elder brother?! I can’t help but ruminate that Kristoph’s debauched concupiscent fantasies of hate-fucking me into oblivion involve something majorly warped!

He sagged back against the cushions and clenched his eyes shut.

The German’s daydreams are probably along the lines of Kristoph lounging on a throne in his penthouse, like Jabba the Hutt, with me chained up at his side, wearing Princess Leia’s golden bikini… Argh! Christ on a jet ski! Why did I just allow my masochistic mind to go to The Dark Side?! The worst part is I can’t even obliterate this disturbia image from my mind with wine anymore! It’s just as well I suppose – wasn’t booze what got me into most of these messes?!

The card shark dragged a hand down his mug and grunted inaudibly, yet unable to stop his reflections about the sinister, spectacled lawyer.

What is the deal with Klavier and Kristoph?! If they had their way, I’d be making it through their entire Eurotrash family tree! The latter Gavin is decidedly worse though – at least the prosecutor isn’t a homicidal maniac! I suppose I should be grateful the Periwinkle Pisshead didn’t ask me to play Lonely Island’s “Jizz in My Pants!” Ugh! To quote Cleveland Brown. “Oh, that’s naaaaasty!” Yet that’s exactly what transpired that night he asked me to play “Pour Some Sugar on Me” which now has a whole new meaning…Gah! I have no idea why I just chose to do that to myself! Now I need brain bleach!

The sheer absurdity of his inner ramblings suddenly hit full force, and despite everything, Phoenix found himself letting out a short bark of laughter. The situation was like something out of a tragic melodrama/B-rated horror … it even had the prerequisite raunchy skin-flick angle!

The former King of the Turnabout turned Dark Knight was the perpetually tormented, noble-hearted, yet delightfully flawed protagonist, with a murky past he was trying to escape while attempting to rehabilitate himself. The one thing on earth the valiant hero desired while on his quest for justice and seeking a better life for both himself and his young daughter was uncovering the truth behind his downfall! In spite of this, he kept finding not only monkey-wrenches thwarting his newfound sobriety, but other horrendous obstacles hindering his progressions whilst he blindly stumbled upon the trail of finding the truth, redemption, and hopefully, true love along the way!

The spiky-haired man buried his head in his hands and began cracking up at the mental image he had just summated for his catastrophic life – a sure sign that he was venturing near hysteria.

Forget the horrific porno drama film – if this were Japan instead of LA, it’d be more like a legal videogame! Ahh haha! Oh, Lord… I kill me!

He laughed uproariously at the entire irony of ludicrous notion as tears of mirth spilled from his eyes.

I can see it now – my tale would encompass the additive backstory of my shameful substance abuse, which was due to not only the angst of a badge lost but also because of my limerence behind losing… The One That Got Away! It could even be partially turned into some sort of depressing, tear-jerker soap opera …played worldwide by both males and females! They’d just need to take out all my calamitous man-whore moments to ensure it’s kid-friendly!

Phoenix was rolling on the sofa now, clutching his sides as he continued with the lunacy of it all.

What an imagination I’ve got! As if anyone would be keen to play a game that’d be less courtroom drama and more of a visual novel about the life and times of a disbarred Ace Attorney! A now disgraced has-been turned hobo bum/single father/recovering alcoholic with untamable, trademarked porcupine hair which he needs to cover with a beanie to become utterly incognito! A tragic figure whose laconic, brooding demeanor seems to now attract an endless barrage of short-term rentals instead of true love, but essentially, more than anything else, is so unbearably, despondently… lonely?

Abruptly, his guffawing dwindled, and the sobering realization of his actual plight sunk in heavily upon him.

What the hell am I even laughing at? This is the lowest I have ever been in my entire life!

He dropped his head into his hands as the overwhelming lugubriousness washed over him once again.

In this perpetual never-ending cycle of loneliness, there is no past or future, just living by the moment. Every day is measured from the moment of waking into this new reality until my body can do no more until sleep comes to rest this weary mind. Each day I greet the sun like a climber greets their rope, fingers holding on fast despite the pain. It is grief, no different from bereavement, coming in wintry waves. Now I don’t even have the vice of a comforting bottle around to keep me company at this moment while I reflect on yet another bullet dodged.

Phoenix knew the moment he started to cry, that he was really, truly alone. He wept slowly, with tears dripping down his temples and the soft hum of his own voice echoing throughout the silent room.

I know I got lucky in receiving a Not Guilty verdict and the real perpetrator being discovered. I should be celebrating my newfound freedom, or sniggering about my ridiculous inner monologue with a buddy. But there is no one to accompany me today. I know Edgeworth would’ve gotten a big kick out of this comedy of errors that has become my life. Maya would’ve laughed herself silly at my soap opera/video game conception, told me what a big dork I was, and then made me go out with her for burgers to savor the triumphant taste of justice at that trial today!

He knew he existed and breathed. Yet save for Trucy, he meant nothing to anyone anymore.

Consequently, I languish alone on my couch, with only the slight bruise on my cheek as my only reminder of Apollo Justice, who saved my head from the noose today. That honorable, perseverant young attorney –– one reminiscent of me from a previous life – who obviously used to look up to me…now hates my guts! All because he believes I was the one behind that “forged evidence” today. Because I had no choice but to take the rap for her, just like any good father would, all due to the naughty magician’s trick played by my daughter, the sole light of my life. Not so coincidentally, said juvenile outlaw is presently nowhere to be found! Consequently, I can only sit here all by my lonesome, and mull another forgery to my name I didn’t commit, along with the fact that even though Kristoph is in jail now, I remain a disgraced pariah of society.

The rest of the world he’d known could be seen, drifting farther and farther away as teardrops made up his ocean. They fell upon his lips and stuck to his eyelashes. Phoenix could taste them, rolling down his parched throat. It was just him…and his solitude. He had lost himself. He had lost himself in an endless ocean of despair with no beacon of light or hope in sight.

When friends feel like paper chains in the rain and the sky holds nothing but the promise of more storms, life is lonely. When all I want is a hand to hold or an arm about my shoulders and none comes, the world becomes cold and empty, a slow poison for the soul. We are born to be loved and nurtured and to do the same for others. We are born to be in tribes with social bonds that last a lifetime. It’s times like this I wish I could melt in the rain like those paper people, and fade away. Anything to stop the ever-present pain. All I have now are memories of those I’ve known and adored, who for various reasons, have left me to silence, one so deafening that it frightens me. All the while, my hopes for a better tomorrow diminish into the blackening distance….

A sudden sharp series of rapping at the front door jolted him out of his self-pitying, lachrymose state.

What the hell? Did Truce decide to finally come home and face the music? But why wouldn’t she use her keys? Maybe she forgot them?

He hurriedly dried his eyes on the sleeves of his sweatshirt, and with a mingled sense of inertia and lassitude, reluctantly got up from the couch to answer the call of the persistent knocker.

I wonder who it could be. I certainly wasn’t awaiting any company! It’s got to be Truce!

He furrowed his brow while wracking his brain about who his mystery caller was.

When Gumshoe had reluctantly arrested him at The Borscht Bowl club three nights ago after the nightmare incident with Shadi Smith, the kindhearted flatfoot had alerted his old pal that his murder trial would definitely make news in all the papers. He’d then later confirmed this while the thrice accused had been at the detention center. Considering the brawny man and his ham-sized fists would’ve made a much heavier thudding sound, the spiky-haired man could surmise it wasn’t the big lug at the door.

Jeez, don’t tell me it’s some pesky reporter that’s tracked down where I live?! They haven’t bothered me since I first got disbarred…

Trudging to the door and peering through the peephole, Phoenix caught his first glance of a very familiar hairstyle which he hadn’t seen in a dog’s age! He blinked rapidly and his breath halted in his chest. His fragmented mind wildly pondered if his teary eyes were making him a victim of wishful thinking, considering he’d just been lamenting about ghosts of his past! But what were the odds of one of them materializing?

As he threw open the door, at last, his heart stood still for a split second as he finally registered who the unexpected visitor was.

“Holy blast from the past, huh?” The familiar chipper voice in his ear was immediately accompanied by feminine curves being plastered against the poleaxed ex-lawyer’s chest. “It’s been far too long! I’ve missed you so much!”

The card shark reflexively returned the effusive embrace, which nearly knocked him backward, but found himself too gobsmacked to even reply.

“Cat got your tongue?” That beloved, unforgettable feminine titter. “I know you weren’t expecting me, of all people, but you seriously look as though you’ve seen a ghost!”

The body in his arms wasn’t an apparition! The poker champ realized dazedly. She was most definitely real!

“I’m so sorry I couldn’t come to see you sooner!” The loquacious visitor chirped, uncaring that the thunderstruck man still hadn’t spoken. “But you wouldn’t believe how tied up I’ve been…”

Flashback

Hickfield Clinic – April 15, 2026

“All the best, Phoenix!” Suhkdeep Mann called jauntily after the completely red-faced ER frequent flyer as he hastily departed down the hall. “I would say see you later, but I wouldn’t want to jinx you!”

“What?” A startled woman’s voice came suddenly from behind the emergency room doctor. “The guy who just flew out of here like a bat out of hell – that was Phoenix Wright?!”

She bit her lip and muttered under her breath.

“If so…when the heck did he get so… hot?!”

“Yesss….” The GP slowly turned around, surprised to see a petite brunette standing there. “I take it you know him…?”

“I can’t believe that sprinting blur in the bum gear who just whizzed past me was Mr. Wright!” She blurted out, clapping an astonished hand against her cheek. “He’s changed so much since I saw him last! Heck, he was in suit the last time I laid eyes on him! What was he doing here?”

“I’m afraid I am not at liberty to disclose any sort of confidential details about my patients, past
or present,” the South Asian man replied firmly, eyeing her dubiously. “How may I help you, Miss…?”

“Detective Ema Skye, LAPD.” She quickly flashed her badge. “I was notified by my colleague to come to investigate a recent arrival to the ER because drug usage was suspected?”

“Ah yes, of course.”

Dr. Mann smiled politely, then cast a furtive glance at the still unconscious and heavily medicated Dee Vasquez, who appeared to be resting peacefully now.

“As I have now finished tending to this patient, I will be happy to take you over to where these particular
… arrivals have been admitted.”

The Punjab chortled ruefully.

“This is quite a night of hedonistic hijinks gone haywire!” He mumbled, as if to himself. “I am beginning to wonder how this has managed to become my unwitting area of expertise!”

Ema wasn’t sure she’d heard him correctly, as she’d just popped a handful of crunchy chocolate snacks into her mouth, and the loud munching had drowned out most of the physician’s musings.

“Pardon me, doctor? Hedonistic what now?”

“Oh, nothing.” The medic shook his head slightly and then smiled winsomely at the quizzical Snackoo muncher. “Apologies, Detective Skye. I was thinking out loud. At this point in my career – and with the last patient in particular – I suppose nothing should shock me! Generally, it does not. However, while we have managed to get the dyad separated, at last, I suppose it was the way the young man was
dressed when they were rushed in here that caught me off-guard, even if the actual cause for ER admission did not.”

“I’m a little bit confused.” A perplexed frown marred Ema’s smooth forehead. “Detective Dick Gumshoe didn’t give me any details beyond the suspected drug charges. Did you just say the couple needed to be separated?”

Dr. Mann led the policewoman to the curtained cubicle at the end of the hall.

“Affirmative. The youth requires further assistance and remains in ER care, whereas the woman isn’t quite coherent yet, a bit groggy from the copious amounts of muscle relaxants required to get her unstuck from her lover. She was straddling him, and was then unable to free herself, due to a very severe case of penis captivus.”

“Is that even possible, scientifically speaking?” Ema gawped at him. “I thought such tales were urban legends?”

“Usually, in similar situations of vaginismus, the clamped down vaginal muscles responsible for causing the captivity of the two united partners eventually does relax on their own, with no need of medical intervention,” Dr. Mann explained. “However, this incident was not short-lived, as the youth essentially needed to be forcibly removed, with the assistance of medications, bountiful lubricant, and two very burly orderlies…”

“Ouch!” She cringed at the imagery. “That sounds embarrassingly painful – not to mention, um, painfully embarrassing!”

“Indeed.” His countenance was solemn. “That loud popping, similar to the uncorking noise made with a champagne bottle, may very well haunt me to the end of my days! If possible, it was even more disquieting than the shrill screaming sounds made by the young man! He seemed truly terrified the required force required for the staff to lift his lover off had somehow separated him from his manhood.”

“How could he have possibly thought such a crazy thing?” She choked back a horrified laugh. “Surely he would have felt it … ah … dislodging?!”

“At the time, he was, and still continues to complain of a total numbing sensation in his groin, ergo perhaps he would not have! I was happy to advise him such was not the case – for which he was so relieved, he burst into a beholden session of sobbing for the next five minutes into my lab coat. You can see still the tearstains on my shoulder if you look closely enough.”

Dr. Mann valiantly attempted tried to hide the glimmer of amusement in his eyes as he recounted this part of the story, yet failed miserably. Seeing the Detective biting back a snicker, he desperately tried to resume his normally authoritative demeanor.

“The fact that the patient is maintaining an erection, which is failing to subside, even half an hour since admittance, prompted us to think the situation might require police investigation. I must warn you that the youth is also being most uncooperative about disclosing what substances he and Miss May indulged in. Moreover, he refuses to allow testing of any sort!”

“We could get a warrant to get testing, even without his consent.” Ema tapped her chin thoughtfully. “But to do so may take time –”

“Which we may not have, because, in the meantime, this matter is not subsiding!” The GP’s visage was wreathed with concern. “He will only deny having taken Viagra and just vaguely eluded to indulging in “angel dust.” I am skeptical about that claim because, during all my years in ER, I have never seen mere cocaine cause such an extreme reaction.”

“Miss May, you said?” The Detective wrinkled her brow. “Why does that sound vaguely familiar…?”

“Miss April May,” Dr. Mann affirmed, checking his chart. “Age 33. Her partner is Wocky Kitaki, age 19…”

“April May?!” Ema’s jaw hit her chest. “We only released her for being an accessory to the murder of Mia Fey earlier this year! Now you’re telling me she’s a suspect for a drug crime?!”

“Despite his reluctance in helping us solve this mystery, Mr. Kitaki is insistent that we keep these matters private and give him first-class care, otherwise his infamous father will: “shoot first, and questions later!”

“Excuse me?! This little hooligan – he tried intimidating you?!”

“Mr. Kitaki said, and I quote: ‘A man fights to protect what’s valuable to him, you know what I’m saying? And I’m protective of my junk! Anything happens to me or my shizzle, my father’s gonna bust a cap in your collective asses, yo!’

Dr. Mann appeared distinctly uncomfortable.

“I hope this delicate matter can be left in your capable hands, Detective. I have no desire to have any foreign objects lodged into my posterior area by an angry gangster! My specialty is getting items to exit from bodily orifices, not enter them!”

“I can’t believe this gobshite is being such a little punk with the doctors who are trying to save his sorry teenage junk!” Adorable chipmunk cheeks puffed out in annoyance. “Doesn’t he grasp that if he doesn’t tell you what he was on, you can’t treat him?!”

“The patient insisted, and again, I quote: you quackers are wack, man! I did some nose candy, and shizz got out of control! No biggity! It ain’t no crime!”

“Oh yes, it is!” She tried to sound grim, even though her lips twitched at hearing this slang repeated in the practitioner’s lilting East Indian accent. “Mr. Kitaki’s got a huge dose of reality coming at him – right in the kisser!”

“I have zero doubts about your ability to get him to cough up the information we so urgently seek.” Dr. Mann smiled with relief. “If it’s any assistance to you at all, I do have a sneaking suspicion as to why Mr. Kitaki is being so recalcitrant about this whole coitus interruptus, Detective Skye…”

The forensic enthusiast absorbed this particular telling detail the physician relayed to her, then smirked knowingly.

“It figures! Don’t you worry doctor – I will get the kid to talk! You go make your rounds. All I need is
 five minutes with the little brat!”

Ema stormed into the cubicle and found Wocky Kitaki lying back on the gurney with a sulky expression.

The scrawny boy – whose contorted moue somehow managed to indicate simultaneous pain and petulance! – broke into an appreciative grin at the sight of the pretty Detective, but she was too sidetracked by several other glaring factors to even notice the unspoken flattery.

For one thing, Mr. Everlast had the most bizarre orange and yellow hairdo she’d ever seen on a non-furry! Nevertheless, his hairstyle was a real pip compared to his presently adorned outfit! The only thing that could’ve distracted the rookie Detective from her focused task, besides the dual-colored “fox-ears” on the wannabe thug’s fat head… was the even more preposterous ensemble he was wearing!

Dr. Mann wasn’t kidding about that getup! No wonder even a doctor who’s seen it all could have been taken aback at first sight!

Wocky Kitaki, self-proclaimed “G” and “gangster extraordinaire” was dressed up… In a Playboy Bunny outfit!

In light of the fact that said attire wasn’t leaving much to the imagination, Ema wasn’t quite sure where a safe place was to place her poor, abused eyes. She was visibly recoiling from the unforgettable sight – which could never be unseen! – that was threatening to get worse!

Mayday, Madame Curie! I can tell the buttons of that snap crotch are impending to burst under the strain of his… Holy Criminalities!

The scowling teen was in the iconic black and white Playmate costume. The black satiny, strapless stretch one-piece on his spindly frame was so elaborate, Hugh Hefner himself would have been proud! It even had the fiber-filled bust cups, white sheeny cuffs, collar bow tie, and a silky bendable bunny-eared headpiece as the finishing touch. Since he was lying on his side, Ema could see the outfit also included underwire cottontail back detailing, with a detachable faux fur tail!

The speechless law enforcer was openly gaping for a good few moments before she realized her unprofessionalism, and closed her mouth hurriedly. Unfazed, Wocky’s beady eyes lit up with interest at the sight of her.

“A’yo, a’yo, a’yo yo yo! Are you The Heat?” The wannabe gangsta’ waggled his stupid pointed brows in a manner he clearly thought was irresistible. “Nice to see such a foxy lady cop after having all these fug quackers all up in my grill! The po-po’s keepin’ it real fo’sho!”

Ema hated him at first sight.

One boorish, sexist male boss who insists on condescendingly addressing me as Fräulein Detective is bad enough! She fumed inwardly. But there is no way in hell I am taking any lip from this little shit!

“That’s Detective Skye to you, Mr. Kitaki,” she corrected icily as she stepped into the small space and yanked the curtains shut behind her. “I’m here to ask you a few questions about the incident that took place tonight.”

“I ain’t changin’ my tune from what I already told those quacks!” Wocky shot back defiantly. “Me and the lady got into some blow before we decided to smash, and some unplanned shizz went down that needs to be fixed ASAP, ya’ know what I’m sayin’?”

“You do realize if you’re admitting to the use of illegal substances, you’re facing legal repercussions? Even possible jail time?”

“A G’s not a G till he does some hard time! Bizzoooy!”

The exasperated Detective simply goggled at him while her brain tried to process the migraine-inducing “street lingo” that he was attempting to pass off as English.

“I don’t believe that you willingly took any sort of drugs whatsoever. Unless of course, you have a Mommy-complex and make a habit of hooking up with women who are almost twice your age and dressing like up like a Playmate/Furry whenever you do!”

“Furry?! You dissin’ my ‘do, lady cop?” Wocky proudly preened and gestured at his pointed fringe. “Straight goods, homes – this be my own shizz – I’m a fox with the ladies all day, every day, ya feel me?”

Oops! She flushed slightly. So he’s not a furry! I didn’t realize he actually looked that way on purpose! I was almost convinced/hoping it was part of the roleplay!

“Dizzam! Bein’ a fox ain’t just for play! I’m all about the swag, and my ‘do is tight, yo! It’s the real deal for this OG! As for this getup, it’s what Sweet Tits wanted! I always aim to please any shawty of mine!” He winked lasciviously at the Detective, who tried not to gag. “I just hang loose and let things go with the flow. You hearin’ what I’m layin’ down, bizzoy?”

“Well unfortunately Sweet Tits is in no current state to further elaborate on what went down tonight,” she said wryly. “And time is of valuable essence if they’re going to remedy your current situation. Do you know how they say to consult a doctor if you have an erection that lasts over four hours, Mr. Kitaki? They don’t mean call them up to brag! Do you understand that if they can’t run the tests to provide the proper anecdote for this situation, there’s a very high chance that eventually you might lose it?”

“Wha’diss? Lose my pulsating thrill hammer?!” A flicker of fear crossed over Wocky’s pinched-up mien. “Please tell me you don’t for realz mean losin’ my Mammoth Mountain?!”

“Well, you aren’t consenting to voluntary testing, which means I’d need a warrant, but that will take a few more hours. It wouldn’t be the greatest route to go, since roughly two hours have passed now, so forget mountain – you’d be lucky if you were even left with a molehill.” She jutted her chin towards the area in question so there was no confusion. “We aren’t talking about merely subsiding your erection, but losing your pride and joy… entirely.”

Not that there’s a whole lot to be proud of, from what I can see! She added silently, but simply arched her brow in wait for his response.

“You’re yankin’ my chain, fo’ shizzle!” Wocky protectively placed his hands over his crotch. “Not
my Iron Wang!”

“Would I joke about something like that?” Ema affixed her most unpleasant sneer. “As someone who’s extensively studied science, believe you me, it shan’t be a painless loss of your L’il Wang if they have to hypothesize the origin of your problem and speculate treatment of it. In fact, the remedy procedure may even more insufferable than the aftermath! ”

“Yo, lady! That’s Iron Wang Not L’il Wang!”

The forensic lover turned swiftly left then, ignoring the vain protests he called behind her retreating back as he tried to correct her misquoted moniker for his nether regions. She returned a few moments later, holding an enormous syringe that rivaled the size of those used for epidurals. It had a menacing, 8 cm needle with a blunt tip at the end.

“First, they’ll disinfect the area to minimize infections – but no anesthetic, because they want to remove your current numbing sensation, not add to it. Next, they’ll proceed with injection, until the entire needle tip has been inserted. It will then dispel what will most likely feel like a cool, foreign, gelatin-like substance being pumped into a narrow channel of your body which would normally only be used as an exit…”

Fox Boy’s eyes nearly bugged out of his head while she brusquely continued, her genuine enthusiasm mounting despite herself as she went into the scientific nitty-gritty details.

“In order to proceed, of course, they will need to expose, then broaden, the entrance to your urethra …via means of your meatus. In case you didn’t know, that means your penile hole.”

Ema affected her best clinical intonation, pretending not to notice his countenance had gone as ashen as the linen he was lying on. Then, with a sly smirk, she reached into her lab coat pocket and whipped out another metal instrument known as a sounding rod. To the hoodlum’s petrified gaze, it resembled a long, thin metal stick with smooth, rounded ends. It was easily 3 mm, with a 7 mm ball at one end, which she merrily elaborated was “to help avoid losing it on the way down.”

“Once the lubricating sterilizer has been applied, this apparatus will thereafter be inserted once your opening is adequately dilated, to make room for this.”

She whipped out the final terrifying rod device, the pièce de résistance, this one bearing a hose attachment.

Wocky’s knuckles turned white as he clutched the sheet in fear.

“Last but not least, this here is a prince catheter wand. It will make collecting the samples much easier. As you can see, it also has a hollow hole to allow it to remain in place and fluids to pass…”

“Step back, bizzoy!” Wocky whimpered slightly, his voice unnaturally high. “I – I know you’re messing with me! No way would these quacks do that kinda shizz to a real OG! They – they know who I am! Who my old man is…”

“Very well. Suit yourself and don’t believe me then, Mr. Kitaki.”

Ema shrugged and nonchalantly dropped the devices back into the deep compartments of her oversized white lab jacket.

“It’s your prerogative whether or not you want to cooperate with the police or put any stock whatsoever into the information I just gave you. I can surely understand your skepticism. After all, I’m just a foxy lady cop. It’s not as though I’ve spent the last nine years in Europe extensively studying forensic sciences or anything.”

She turned to leave but made one casual parting remark that made his blood run even colder than either the sight or explanation of any of those grotesque medical torture contraptions he’d just been subjected to.

“I’m sure Miss May shall still be your shawty and stay by your side, irrespective of whether or not all parts of you remain intact when all is said and done. Yet could the same be said for the little pixie whose picture is on your phone? The one Dr. Mann made me privy to when you were rushed in? I wonder how she would react to the news of your missing anatomy, hmm?”

“That’s my Alita. My fallen angel.” His phizog went from white to beet red, and his voice quaked. “I mean, she’s my ex! Yeah, that’s it. She won’t care what goes down with me! Sweet Tits is my poster girl now!”

“Your ex, you say? But is she really?” Ema drawled insolently, instantly knowing a bad liar when she saw one and deciding to call his bluff. “Most guys don’t usually keep recent photos of their former lovers – with whom they are standing under a banner which reads ‘Happy New Year 2026!’ –  as their wallpaper background on their cell …  four months later! Perhaps you’re a sentimental exception to such rationale? I suppose we could find out for ourselves how heartless this sweet-faced girl truly is? Let’s just give this Alita a call to ascertain how she’d react to the tragic news about her former swine – er, swain – tragically becoming a eunuch…”

Wocky opened his mouth, but not a sound came out. His head began tremulously quivering as if there was a drill to the back of his skull. Ema tilted her own head to the side and eyed him expectantly, knowing she’d made her mark.

The teen’s entire body began to jostle violently, and then in the next instant, the floodgates opened.

“Stop!” He wailed, all his bravado vanquished as he raised a hand to halt her while a lone tear traced down his pink cheek. “Detective Skye, whatever you do, please, don’t let my fallen angel know about this! I’m begging you! Alita’s my fiancée… She – she would never forgive me if she knew what happened!”

“You mean about how you were unfaithful to her tonight?” The brunette eyed him coolly, unmoved by the waterworks. As a cop, she’d seen it all. “Or about how you were so desperate to hide your indiscretion that you would’ve rather gone to jail for bogus drug charges, rather than have Alita find out the truth about your infidelity?”

“I never did no stinkin’ drugs!” The fox boy sobbed pitifully, and just like that, the tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down his round cheeks. “I was rolling with my homies tonight, just kickin’ back, when April came to me out of nowhere. She started chatting me up, then offered me some beer. Next thing I know, I’m back at her place, dressed like a rabbit, and we’re stuck together! And now you’re telling me Ima lose my Iron Wang over this?”

He wiped his runny nose on the gurney sheet, leaving a grotesque snotty trail in the process.

“Wah! My poster girl coulda dealt with a real OG for doing time for getting’ busted doing blow, but she’d never put up with me getting my porker polished elsewhere! Truth is, I’d rather lose all my limbs than ever lose my Alita! Th – that’s why I didn’t want to be tested and have any Po-Po involved! How could I make my shawty ever believe that I unintentionally cheated on her?!”

“But that’s exactly what I think happened.” Ema’s expression was sympathetic now. “I do believe you’re a victim in all this, Mr. Kitaki, and that you were involuntarily drugged by the very predatory April May. Can I take this all to mean that you’ll now concede to the medical staff doing the required testing on you so they can properly treat you?”

“I’ll do anything!”  Wocky wailed pathetically. “J – Just don’t let my fallen angel or anyone find out about this…”

End Flashback

Wright Talent Agency – April 20, 2026

“So that’s why I couldn’t be there to support you for your trial, Mr. Wright! What a nightmare it was getting that warrant for April May!”

Ema emitted a loud groan while flopping back onto the sofa beside the still speechless spiky-haired man.

“Wocky’s a punk, sure, but even he didn’t deserve to be part of her dastardly plot! That beer she gave his underage behind – another charge in itself by the way – was a special cocktail she’d had access to from her Bluecorp days. It was a chemical blend consisting of a large helping of potent aphrodisiac and a dab of British anesthesia called Xanagrafeipam, by anesthesia manufacturer giant, Labrelum. She dosed the kid with enough to make him more susceptible to any and all suggestions, including getting the unsuspecting guy to acquiesce with her kinky bunny fetish!”

She shook her head ruefully, uncaring that her mute companion hadn’t uttered a peep yet.

“The new drug was called Furtivirtulam. It’s very illegal because of how fond sexual predators are of using it on their prey – it puts the old date rape drug, GHB, to shame! I had to go all out and get the warrants required to further investigate since April May refused to talk! You wouldn’t believe all that surveillance camera and recording equipment she had set up at her place! Plus, once tested we found out she was chock full of enough fertility drugs to choke a horse!”

Phoenix’s incredulous eyes grew as round as saucers, and the Detective nodded industriously, seeing that he understood just how vile the non-rehabilitated bimbo’s plot had been.

“Ultimately, if the calculating, cougarish she-devil hadn’t been able to get herself pregnant by the targeted sole heir to the Kitaki fortune, thus guaranteeing her life on easy street, she had a Plan B. She was going to blackmail him with those tawdry pictures to get him to cough up hush money, so she wouldn’t show the photos to the poor kid’s fiancée! Luckily, Wocky was successfully treated, his L’il Wang remains intact, and he gave us all the information we needed to put April away for a very long time, without having to drag his name into the public light. The scheming fortune huntress didn’t even put up a fight about being incarcerated again when she found out all the evidence against her, possibly because she knows if she ever gets out again, she’s a dead woman walking if the Kitaki’s get their hands on her!”

Ema finally paused for a breath and turned pink as she realized how much of a monologue she’d be sprouting instead of being properly reunited with her old friend.

“Once a science geek, always a science geek, huh, Mr. Wright?” She ventured apologetically. “I’m sorry to have been prattling on incessantly like that and probably boring you to near tears. Um, let me see if I can make it up to you by finding some way to amuse you!”

She popped a Snackoo in her mouth and gazed skyward for inspiration, then beamed brightly.

“If I pinch my nose with my fingers, close my mouth tight, and blow real hard, I can make my ears bleed! It’s not as cool as Superman’s X-ray vision, but it’s my trademarked special talent!”

Phoenix simply stared at her, still trying to absorb everything he’d heard while coming to terms with the fact that Ema Skye was seated beside him again after nine long years.

Since her impromptu arrival at his doorstep, the faux musician had been teetering between stupefaction and sheer relief that his old friend wasn’t who he’d initially feared she was! The respite had only further deepened when he’d noted that in the near-decade since he’d last seen the younger Skye sister, her striking resemblance to his former assistant had, mercifully, dwindled drastically. The cute and bubbly teen had now blossomed into a young lady with her own unique kind of beauty.

Ema’s wavy toffee hair, still in its familiar topknot, swished gently to her shoulders. Those wide-set eyes, the color of fresh dew glinting in the sunlight off an emerald leaf, sparkled with the same excited zest for life he’d known ages ago. Full, rosebud lips curved into a smile, exuding Ema’s brand of familiar warmth, which he realized he’d sorely missed. At 25, her baby face was still evident, but now her chin curved gracefully around classically sculpted feminine features, including a slightly rounded nose against high cheekbones and a flawless peaches and cream complexion.

The former wino couldn’t tell by the ill-fitting lab coat how much of his friend’s coltish teenage frame had bloomed in womanhood. While she wasn’t tall, long-stemmed, and model-girl in appearance like her older sibling, he could make out that Ema appeared to have filled out in all the right places, then mentally chastised himself for even allowing his thoughts to have gone there, however briefly!

He found his voice at last, and let out a chuckle at the endearing but unnecessary offer she’d just made.

“There’s no need to make anything bleed! It’s quite alright, Ema,” he replied, his voice laced with amusement and affection. “I think it’s great how you haven’t lost your zeal or passion for science, even if you’re not in your dream job right now. It’s nice to know that as much as things have drastically changed in my life since we last saw one another, some things have stayed the same.”

“Certain things have changed though,” she remarked coyly, fluttering her long lashes at the flummoxed hobo. “When Lana mentioned her fling with you, she failed to indicate what a fine specimen you’d morphed into, Mr. Wright! How have you managed to get even hotter with age?”

Phoenix felt the heat rising in his cheeks, although he wasn’t sure if from the compliment or the realization that if Lana had mentioned their short-lived relationship to her sister, that possibly also meant she’d told Ema how disastrously things had ended between them!

“Um, your sister mentioned our history to you, did she?” He asked awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck and shooting her a sheepish grin. “I hope that means she has no hard feelings, then, heh, heh?”

“None, whatsoever!” The Detective answered cheerily, the appreciative gleam in her eyes now evident, making him reflexively inch backward. “And of course she told me – we’re sisters! We tell each other everything!”

She leaned closer to him, not at all daunted by his mortified expression. If anything, it titillated her even more. No matter how old the ex-attorney got, he was still like a shy, dorky kid in a hot as hell adult body. It was cute – maybe that’s why she was so attracted to him now, and why she’d always liked him so much. Phoenix’s inherent innocence was one of his best qualities.

“Lana doesn’t blame you at all for taking off like the hounds of hell were on your tail when she tried to face-fuck you, for the record. She realizes it was too much, too soon – and that she should have known better than to try the same stuff she did with Jake without discussing it with you first.”

The ex-lawyer wished the plush sofa cushions could have opened up and swallowed him whole at that moment. This all sounded more like a case of sisterly scare, not share!

“Lana really hopes you can forgive her drunken antics, Mr. Wright. After being in jail without any sort of alcohol so long, it’s no wonder she was a lightweight from just that glass of wine, which made her act so uncharacteristically bold and brazen!”

“Um, Ema, it’s good to hear your sister doesn’t hate me for the way things ended,” he said weakly, his cheeks turning even redder. “But still… I’m starting to feel a bit uncomfortable with all our private information being aired out like this, you know?”

“Lana’s back with Jake now,” the girl went on, as though he hadn’t spoken. “So I know she wouldn’t care if I decided to fuel my own curiosities with you in the name of hands-on, explorative methodical research!”

“Um, research?” He gulped, uncertain how to take all this as she continued inching closer to him.

“Lana and I are full biological siblings! It would be the ultimate theory tested to certify if, scientifically speaking, your body and brain responded to us in a similar or entirely separate manner!” Her teal eyes glimmered with enthusiasm. “This case study would have the additional benefit of being equally enjoyable for both parties during this investigation! There’s also the bonus that I have Lana’s full blessing to proceed!”

I don’t believe this! Phoenix moaned internally, clapping a hand over his eyes. Either I’m nothing more than a piece of meat to every woman and man I encounter, but now, I’m a labyrinth-running rodent to be scrutinized too?! Lana’s blessings?! Jesus, these Skye sisters truly believe in keeping it in the family! They’ve got to be the most bizarre set of siblings I’ve ever encountered – and this is coming from someone who’s had to deal with Hawthornes, Gavins and Feys…oh my!

“Ema, as much as I am not averse to doing my part in the name of scientific progression and research…” He put up his palms in a no-offense jester. “Trust me, I’m flattered! But it’s been a brutally rough day for me, and this is all just a bit too much right now. I’m not really in the mood to be subjected like some sort of lab rat in any sort of conducted experiment!”

“Oh no!” She gasped in dismay, her eyes turning into golf balls. “This came out all wrong! I never meant to make it sound as though I merely saw you as a specimen to examine under a microscope, Mr. Wright!
I – I’m so sorry! I’ve spent too much of my life as a science-loving bibliophage, and am therefore too much of an inexperienced nerd to properly convey how I feel about things when I’m outside of a lab.”

Phoenix caught the slight catch in her cadence and studied the veracity on that lovely visage as she gripped his hands, her tone as earnest and pleading as the look in her eyes.

“Mr. Wright, I’ve wanted to tell you something for a long time.” The brunette swallowed, as her throat had suddenly gone dry. “The thing is – about you – I’ve always…”

Immediately, the pianist knew where this conversation was going, and suddenly wished to halt it in its tracks. From his ever-present magatama in his pocket, he could see no psyche locks present, and therefore knew that whatever she was trying to convey was being done with nothing but utmost sincerity, but he didn’t feel equipped to handle it right then.

“Ema, please. Don’t say it. I can’t deal with this right now…”

He reluctantly pushed the girl away, teary-eyed and troubled. However, that only rekindled her frustration. She quickly grabbed his wrists and tugged him back to face her.

“Why not?” She pleaded. “Why can’t you handle the truth about how I feel about you?”

Phoenix turned away, conflicted and vulnerable, and somehow Ema thought she saw a shadow of the young lawyer she’d known many moons ago.

“For one thing, I dated your sister! And you’re still so young … you have your whole life ahead of you, whereas I have nothing to offer you or anyone. I’d only drag you down through the mud with me…”

“You don’t have to feel responsible for me, Mr. Wright.” She reached up to cradle the man’s cheek, turning his head so he could see the adoration in her eyes. “I’m a grown woman now, not some kid you’d be taking advantage of. I care about you. I always have. It kills me that horrid April May kept me from coming to you sooner and being there for you when you’ve needed support the most! I wish I could have decked her for that! You deserved to have a friend be there for you, the way you were for Lana. And for me.”

Her sincerity and maturity struck a chord in him. The broken man stared unabashedly at the girl – no, woman – seated right in front of him, and chuckled slightly. However, it wasn’t a bitter or miserable sound; it was the kind of laughter that felt right like a great wave of relief had finally descended upon him, a sort of peace that had eluded him for years.

“So, you still give a scientific rat’s ass about the forgin’ attorney, do you?” He tipped his head down so only the brim of his beanie was visible, while partially obscuring his mien from her view. “You really don’t believe I did it, as everyone else does?”

“I believe in you,” she replied quietly. “If there was ever a time you could have used forged evidence, it would’ve been during Lana’s trial. But you didn’t. That’s not you. That’s never been you.”

He raised his head, at last, revealing a genuine smile. It was big and warm and reached his hypnotic eyes, and Ema thought Phoenix appeared downright delectable at that instant.

“It’s so nice to see you smiling. I wish I’d been able to come and light up your face like that sooner!” She took his hand again and gave it a squeeze. “Curse that skankwad April May! Ugh…I’ve never wanted to assault someone so bad in life, ever! Unfortunately, I wasted my one free-pass when I bitch-slapped Kristoph Gavin’s glimmerous fop of a brother for his part in your disbarring!”

“You did what?!”

He swallowed back a laugh of reluctant admiration for her fierce loyalty, then searched her visage for signs of humor to indicate she was joking about having seriously used bodily force on her immediate superior, yet found none.

“Dammit, Ema! Police brutality solves nothing! You could have been charged with assault – and/or fired on the spot! What were you thinking?!”

“I couldn’t help myself! To know that shit slice was a part of something so horrible happening to a man who’s done so much for me and my family and countless others …!” She sighed regretfully. “I know it didn’t get your badge back, but sure made me feel better!”

“Let it go, my friend,” Phoenix said tiredly. “We can’t prove that Kristoph was the one who set me up, or that Klavier had had any part of it. And abusing your power will only get your badge taken away. Then we’ll both be … nothing but losers.”

His saddened look of resignation made her want to weep.

“You’re not a loser, Mr. Wright!” She cried plaintively. “You can’t give up! I won’t stop till I’ve proven your innocence!”

“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to upset you.” He peered intently into her welled-up, stormy eyes. “Why are you getting so worked up over this, though?”

“Because you were my hero! Lana and I owe the world to you! Badge or not, you’re still Phoenix
Freaking Wright!” She wiped away the frustrated stray tears that had spilled over. “As well as the most wonderful, selfless, handsome man I’ve ever known.”

“Handsome?” The DILF blushed adorably and took off his hat as he raked a hand through his spikes. “Even with this bum attire? The beanie, sweats, and scuff?”

She nodded, blushing as well now that she’d admitted her attraction to the very prime male sitting beside her. A stray lock of ebony hair fell carelessly across his forehead, making him resemble an adorable Superman. All his features were strong and defined, from his distinct cheekbones to his full lips and squared jawline, shadowed with sexy stubble.

Nonetheless, it was those spellbinding orbs that pinned her to the spot. They seemed to glow blue fire as they watched her. They were deep and catastrophic; vivid indigo like the ocean at night. This close, she could see the flecks of turbulent emotion within them as he struggled to come to terms with the fact that she found him attractive, as though it were such an unfathomable notion for him. He was so fetching, yet had no clue of it whatsoever, which just made his entire essence seem all the more alluring.

“I’ve got to let you know that I find your admiration to be equal parts flattering …and astonishing!” He admitted shyly. “I’d always thought you were more of an Edgeworth fan girl. Not too many women are lining up at the door for a disgraced ‘forging’ attorney.”

“You’re not wrong. I did have a crush on Mr. Edgeworth back then – when I was just a teenager!” Her ardor was unmistakable. “But as I said, I’m not a kid anymore, Mr. Wright. I’m a grown woman now. And this woman knows what truly matters in life – kindhearted, justice avengers like you!”

The words were like a palliating salve on the pianist’s battered heart. After the day he’d had, and the tears he’d shed earlier in his morose and melancholic state, hearing that there was a woman out there who legitimately cared about him, not just parts of him, and who seemed normal – sibling oversharing notwithstanding! – felt like a healing Band-Aid had been affixed to the wounds of his battered heart.

“Oh, Ema.” He gently squeezed her shoulder. “Thank you so much for thinking more of me than I do myself.”

“You will rise from the ashes, and I’m going to be here by your side when you do!” She grabbed his face and peered searchingly into his suddenly intense sapphire gaze. “And for what it’s worth … I happened to think you’re even more handsome now than you were back then! To be frank, I don’t know how I could have ever missed it.”

His heart began to pound at the sight of her determined, tender expression. She had grown into such a beauty – he had no choice but to acknowledge this now, however much he tried not to. Although he’d dated her sister, and he’d known her since she was a girl …God help him, he was still a man … a tortured, admittedly lonely, vulnerable man. Moreover, Ema was right here… so willing…so wanting…and very much … all woman.

She caught the flicker of flame in his gaze, and every cell of her body went on alert. Under her bra, her peaks hardened, pushing against the thin fabric of her blouse beneath her lab coat. She felt tingles shoot up and down her spine as she saw his eyes linger on the suddenly uneven rise and fall of her chest. She moved her legs closer to his as the ache between her thighs grew. Every hair on her body was standing on end as her entire being clamored its need for this bashful Adonis. He was so blatantly, unapologetically male. Not even the ill-fitting sweats could mask how broadly muscled he was in contrast to her petite, slender frame, which made her feel so comparatively small and feminine. Her stomach fluttered, but it wasn’t with fear.

Having Phoenix so close to her was having a libidinous effect on all her senses.

He drew in a shuddering breath, and his chest expanded, almost touching her bosom. Her nubs tightened even further, now practically straining to feel those hard muscles against her curves. Ema gasped as the heat between them ignited, sending rivulets of lightning flaring throughout her body. She felt tiny goosebumps everywhere. Her toes curled in her shoes, and she was throbbing so badly with lust that she felt positively lightheaded.

She inhaled deeply, and immediately knew it was a mistake. His masculine scent of clean, sandalwood soap filled her nostrils. But underneath it all was just the tantalizing smell of Phoenix himself; a man who could set her on fire with barely a glance or a touch.

“As you said, you were just a teenager back then,” he whispered. “Maybe you have a thing for hobos now?”

“When they’re this sexy, I do! Plus, I’m no longer a girl but all woman now Phoenix,” she whispered back, her mouth hovering just inches from his. “Let me show you just how much I’ve grown up…”

She leaned closer then, and his last shreds of sanity screamed at him, although not at all loudly, that this was sheer madness, and something they’d possibly both regret…

The science beauty softly placed her lips over his, slipping her warm tongue past his resisting lips, gently probing until they parted. Slowly, his tongue began to move against hers, tasting it first, feeling the warm wetness of it as it began to tangle with his. They breathed deeply into each other’s mouths and, unable to further resist or deny her this kiss, Phoenix grabbed each side of her face and pressed her forcefully against him, locking his lips around hers with ravenous intent. She moaned into his mouth and he kissed her harder, trying to obviate all the pain from that day with this one passionate embrace, wrapping a strong arm around her back and pulling the rest of her body close as they continued kissing with frantic urgency.

Her lab coat soon floated to the floor, along with his hoodie and T-shirt.

Even though they both still had their pants on, Ema’s pulse was racing as she stared up at his half-naked physique from her location of being pinned under him on that couch. His defined torso appeared as if it’d been sculpted in stone. His biceps bulged as he leaned over her. She’d never been more aware of a man than she was at that moment. She licked her lips, imagining what it would be like to touch his warm flesh, kiss it, and lick it. Her breasts swelled and her nipples puckered. She could feel the ache in her core growing each second as he pulled her shirt over her head, leaving her only in a white bra now.

Phoenix’s hands came to life as he stroked her sides and roamed over her bosom atop the lacy material, making her press her bust eagerly against his palms. He ground against her, his excitement pressing into her pelvis while his tongue roamed her mouth, slowly, deeply. She shivered at the blatant carnality of it but did nothing to stop him. She felt caught in the pull of some incredible magnet, unable to draw away, unable to stop her body from responding as he tasted her. Her head was head thrown back blissfully as he began raining heated kisses down her throat, cupping and teasing one heaving mound with his right hand, while his left one roamed through her hair and tugged lightly at her topknot to free it…

Then, without warning, he stopped and abruptly jerked back from her, as though he’d been scorched.

Ema’s confused mind still felt hazy as she struggled to sit up in the deep cushions, and found her would-be lover sitting up, his elbows on his knees, and his head buried in his hands.

“Phoenix – Mr. Wright – what’s wrong?” She tentatively placed a hand on his bare shoulder. “Was it something I did?”

“No. Nothing like that,” he rasped hoarsely, squeezing his eyes shut while keeping his head bowed. “But I – I can’t do this! I swear, it’s not you, Ema. It’s – it’s me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” The policewoman felt very exposed and insecure in her state of undress, and she quickly reached for her fallen blouse and clutched it against her chest. “Is it because I came on too strong?”

“No!” He looked up at her then, his expression tortured. “I promise, that’s not it.”

“Then what’s wrong with me?” Ema insisted, shifting herself over to come closer to him. As she did, she accidentally pressed against the buttons of the misplaced stereo remote, which, unknownst to them, had been buried under the sofa cushions.

Immediately, loud music from the radio began playing, and Phoenix stiffened tensely at the song that came on.

See, the thing about you that caught my eye
Is the same thing that makes me change my mind
Kind of hard to explain, but girl, I’ll try
You need to sit down, this may take a while

He hurriedly yanked his T-shirt back on even as his heart gave a sharp pang at the revealing, yet ill-timed lyrics.

See this girl, she sorta looks just like you
She even smiles just the way you do
So innocent she seemed but I was fooled
I’m reminded when I look at you….

It doesn’t how much time has passed. Phoenix pressed at his stinging eyes with the heels of his palms. It doesn’t matter how much wine I drink in attempts to forget her, or how many women I get under, trying to get over her… none of it works! But this particular scenario is worse than all the rest combined! The coloring is different…yet it’s the still same beloved bonhomie disposition and that unspoiled purity…and that hair…

“Nothing’s wrong with you!” He cried, his voice shaking. “You’re beautiful. You’re perfect! You – you just remind me too much of…”

“I remind you of what…?” She echoed blankly, mimicking his actions and putting her blouse back on before registering how his tormented expression had deepened since the music had started. “I don’t understand?”

You remind me of a girl, that I once knew.
See her face whenever I, I look at you.
You won’t believe all of the things she put me through.
This is why I just can’t get with you…

That was when Ema understood at last.

Faint memories from nearly a decade ago resurfaced, and she dimly now recalled grasping, after having seen her photo on the defense attorney’s desk back then, exactly why Phoenix had eventually been persuaded to take Lana’s case in the first place.

Feeling a lump in her throat at the unmistakable angst her friend was in, she quickly reached under the cushion for the controller and clicked the stereo off.

“I’m so sorry, Ema,” the spiky-haired man choked, staring at her with agonized orbs. “It’s just that –”

“It’s OK, Mr. Wright,” she said softly, wrapping her arms around his shoulders in an affectionate hug. “You don’t have to say another word. I get it. And I’m the one who’s sorry. For your loss …for all your losses. For everything that you’ve had to endure. But you needn’t go through anything alone anymore, because I’m your friend. I always have been and I always will be. This incident hadn’t changed a damn thing, I swear! I’m back now, and I’m going to be here for you, no matter what!”

“Thank you, Ema.” Phoenix smiled gratefully for her compassion, then sagged with relief in her arms and rested his head against hers. “I’ve had enough lovers in my life. I honestly just need a friend right now. So badly.”

“You’ve got one for life,” she promised, then let out a dramatic sigh, in an attempt to lighten the mood. “Although I suppose it’s not in neither my sister’s fate nor mine to experience the wild, animalistic throes of coitus with you! Your Phoenix Wright Fan Club has been quite explicit in sharing those details, you know!”

“Ngh!” He yelped, his sadness dwindling and being replaced once more by the ever more frequent mortification. “Fan club?! Are you freakin’ shitting me?!”

“How could I make that up?” She tittered mercilessly. “Is it true you got handcuffed to a bedpost and the LAPD had to come to unlock you?”

“Curse that loudmouth Lotta!” Phoenix pulled his beanie back on his head and dragged it down over his eyes with shame. “Don’t believe everything you hear, Ema!”

“Actually, that one I heard from Gumshoe, and not the fan club!” She trilled jovially. “The worst part of this is, I can’t claim bragging rights that your studly self was the one to have taken my flower!”

“The fuck what now?!” Phoenix’s head shot up with a start. “I would have been … your first?!”

“Well, yeah!” She grinned impishly. “Although I’d like to let you know, for the record, that whatever I lack in primal knowledge, I totally make up for in supreme inquisitiveness!”

Phoenix bit back an amused grin but said nothing as she continued chattering.

“I’ve been super picky despite being such a scholarly nerd girl! I mean, have you ever seen the non-esthetic types of guys who study science? Ugh – they were no better in Europe than they were here! None of my colleagues were the kind any girl would dream of coitusing with someone else’s genitals!”

“As savage as you are in your penis discerning, I guess this proves there is a God!” Phoenix slumped back on the sofa. “Amongst my long list of sins and deviant perversions over the years, I can at least take pride in saying that deflowering an innocent maiden during a mindless moment of casual sex wasn’t amid them!”

“Gee Whillikers, was that the problem?” Ema teased, her eyes twinkling with mirth. “You should have just said so, Mr. Wright! It didn’t have to be casual with us at all!”

“Huh?” The card shark eyed her blankly.

“I mean… you could have just worn a tie!”

“For crying out loud, Ema!” Phoenix didn’t know what or laugh or cry. “That wasn’t what I meant and you know it!”

“OK fine! It was an utterly ridiculous thing to say!” Her turquoise orbs were dancing with merriment now. “I should have asked you to put on the entire famous blue suit to go with it, first! I’m sure you fill it out even better now than you did back then! Hell, you could have worn nothing but the tie and I still would have been down for pound town! Either way, I most certainly wouldn’t have posed any objections!”

“Ema!”

Kurain Village – April 30, 2026

Ring, Ring!

“Hello?”

“Hello, have I reached Fey Manor?

“Yes, this Pearl Fey. How may I assist you?”

“May I speak with the Master of the Kurain Channeling Technique, please?”

There was a pregnant pause while the teenage spirit medium swallowed back the painful lump in her throat, then struggled to answer the devastating question.

“Hello?” The other voice on the line said uncertainly, after a few more seconds of dead silence on the line. “Are you still there? May I speak to Maya Fey, please?”

“I –I’m sorry to tell you this. But unfortunately… Mystic Maya is no longer with us.”

A/N: Thanks to Ariastella for the crazy drug background suggestions and to funny man, my co-pilot for Singing In The Courtroom, Czar Thwomp for adapting some of Fox Boy’s mind-numbing wannabe gangsta lingo in his side-splitting FF, Debauched Steel in the Wocky chapter he wrote, which I used for some research in this chapter. Check it out – in case you haven’t seen his reviews on my stuff, the guy’s a riot!

Usher – U Remind Me