108 The Rules of Engagement

 “We cross our bridges when we come to them and burn them behind us, with nothing to show for our progress except a memory of the smell of smoke, and a presumption that once our eyes watered.”
~ Tom Stoppard~

Pearl Fey and Luke Triton
Fey Manor
December 31, 2025, 4:00 PM

Do I dare disturb the universe?

Pearl eyed herself critically in front of her dresser mirror, loath about the fact that despite the extra care and effort she’d made with her appearance, she still looked as lost and confused as she felt!

Trying to distract herself from her tumultuous thoughts, the spirit medium applied a thin layer of pink lip gloss to her unsmiling mouth. She didn’t want to make her mouth overly gooey and have poor Luke get smeared pearlescent goop all over his face when she kissed him Happy New Year at Uncle Gumshoe’s, once the clock struck midnight!

Yes, he was Uncle Gumshoe now; at 16, Pearl was now a little bit too old to be calling him Uncle Scruffy!

The spirit medium had initially been over the moon about going down to Los Angeles to ring in the New Year. After all, not only would her best friend be in attendance at Aunt Maggey and Uncle Gumshoe’s New Year’s Eve gathering, but also the ever-wacky Uncle Larry, and of course, her “cousins,” Jeff and Gordy, all of whom would be introduced to her beau for the first time.

However, within not even a week, Pearl’s happily festive mood had done a complete turnabout, and she knew that the intuitive and perceptive Luke had noticed the change in her disposition. Even worse was that he now feared her change in demeanor was due to the trepidation of having him meet her Uncle and his clan since bringing your partner to meet the rest of one’s family was such a huge relationship milestone.

Such a silly boy! How could he possibly think such a thing? After all, her boyfriend was charismatic, charming, and a perfect gentleman – with a beautiful British accent! She had no doubt whatsoever that her friends would all love him nearly as much as she did!

The issue was that Pearl remained unable to give any proper reassurance that would’ve squelched the misgivings of the boy she adored – not without divulging the actual reason the teenager felt as tense, confused, and blue as a Swimsuit Illustrated model in the North Pole!

The overwhelmed girl was still at a complete loss about how to possibly explain that it was Maya and Longines’ unexpectedly happy news, which they’d sprung when returning from Paris, that was the true catalyst behind her newfound angst and uncertainty.

Pearl had been wrestling with her conscience regarding the enormous bombshell she’d been withholding from her cousin for quite some time. However, with the brand-new bulletin of Maya’s impending marriage to the hair heir, the adolescent was now going into a New Year still shrouded by the previous year’s secrecy. She was sitting on news, which she had yet to divulge, that seemed even more pertinent than ever, and with each passing day, only further gnawed away at her insides. She was hapless in her longing to understand what the right thing was to do.

And it made her absolutely miserable.

“What should I do?” The spirit medium turned away from the mirror, aggravated tears blurring her vision as she stared helplessly at Feyt. The puppy was sitting on her bed next to his carrier, studying her with loving, but knowing eyes, as though sensing something was amiss with his mommy. “I wish I knew!”

Suddenly there was a knock at the door and Luke’s sweet cadence could be heard from the other side.

“It’s me, Pearl. Might I be allowed to enter?”

“Sure, come in,” the teen said glumly, grabbing her overnight bag with one hand and slinging it over her shoulder as she lifted her four-legged son into her arms. The door opened, and she forced a smile for her boyfriend’s benefit, admiring how handsome he looked without his customary blue cap, dressed in dark brown cords and the blue cotton sweater Maya had given him as a holiday gift. “You look very nice, Luke.”

“As do you. That lavender knit dress your cousin gave you for Christmas makes you look even prettier than usual, and I didn’t think that was possible.” Luke’s tone was rife with admiration as he gallantly took Pearl’s bag and slung it over his shoulder to accompany his overnight carry-on. “Maya wanted me to come to fetch you, as Longines and his assistant will be arriving shortly to collect us. Are you ready to go yet?”

She nodded, her gaze dropping to the floor at the mention of Maya’s fiancé, which was impossible to miss. Heaving a great sigh, the British lad put down the luggage and strode into the room. Placing a gentle hand on her shoulder, he gently tilted her chin up with his finger, a look of loving concern on his mien.

“Tell me something, love. Am I ever going to see you smile again?”

She gazed up at him with a distressed expression, and a look of weariness came over his visage.

“I’ve watched you be like this all week, love, and it’s tearing me apart seeing you this way,” he lamented. “I know Longines wasn’t your ideal choice to be Maya’s life partner, but he’s still a very nice man. Moreover, he seems to make her happy, and that should be what ultimately matters. I understand that you still miss Mr. Wright, but a New Year is upon us; it may be time for you to finally let that go…”

“Longines is fine!” Pearl shook her head. “I honestly don’t mind him anymore, as a person…he’s all right. That’s not quite what this is about…”

“And you’re sure this isn’t a case of you being nervous about your extended family’s reactions to meeting me tonight?”

“Of course not! They’ll love you! I’ve told you, Luke, it’s not you, either!” She rapidly blinked back tears. “Please believe me…”

Noting how distressed she was, Luke wisely backed off, then tried to lighten up the mood

“I could’ve sworn I heard you talking to somebody a moment ago,” he remarked. “Were you using our son as a confidante?”

She nodded silently and cuddled Feyt tightly against her chest.

“I tend to do the same thing myself, with creatures of both the feathery and furry variety,” he teased softly. “Although in my case, of course, they tend to talk back.”

“You’re such a goofball!” Pearl giggled, her mood lifting slightly. “For what it’s worth, despite it having been a one-sided conversation, and despite being male, Feyt is a great listener!”

“Cute,” Luke chortled. “Our little guy can represent and atone for the entire male persuasion in that domain!”

Suddenly his dark eyes turned serious.

“However, by now, you should know that I’m no slouch in the listening department either, love. Whatever it is that’s bothering you, I wish you’d feel comfortable enough to talk to me about it. It might even make you feel better.”

“I have yet to have told anybody this, but you’re right, Luke. I do need to get this off my chest.”

Pearl’s smile faded as she glanced downward again, as though trying to gather courage before she took a deep breath and regarded her boyfriend with glistening eyes.

“That day, back in the spring, when Longines first came here to the village to meet Mystic Maya, I got very upset about the idea of her seeking another suitor so soon after Mr. Nick. Mystic Matilda was nice enough to come after me and try to comfort me, but after she left, I decided I still needed some answers. So, I went to Eagle Mountain and decided it was high time to visit my half-sister…”

Pearl Fey and Iris Hawthorne
Hazakura Temple
April 26, 2025, 7:15 PM

“I didn’t do anything,” Iris whispered tearfully. “Feenie … he came to me, Pearl. I swear to you, I’m telling you the truth.”

“That’s not the point!” Pearl was unmoved at the sight of the flooded eyes gazing back at her. “In the end, it’s all the same! Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t slap you from here to the moon!”

“You can hit me if you want, if it’s going to make you feel better, Pearl.” Iris bowed her head in submission. “But you should know it’s not going to change anything.”

The angry spirit medium faltered slightly at the painful veracity of the words, slowly rolled down her sleeve again, and let out a browbeaten sigh.

“Why’s that?” She asked defeatedly. “Because you love him that much?”

Limpid brown eyes met resigned gray ones. “I never stopped.”

“And… he feels the same way about you?” The teen bit her lip to keep it from trembling.

Iris cast a downcast glance before replying. “I – I’d like to think so.”

“So, what you’re trying to tell me is that you and Mr. Nick … you’re Special Someones now?” Pearl felt numb then, the fight draining out of her completely.

Iris hesitated but didn’t raise her eyes from the ground as she whispered the response.

“Y-yes.”

Almost immediately, heavy chains, invisible to any human eye except for Pearl’s, sprung up and completely covered the shrine maiden then, and two enormous, glowing, red psyche locks now covered Iris’ heart, not even a split second after the affirmation left her lips.

What the heck?! Why on earth did those locks appear the minute Iris stated she was Special Someones with Mr. Nick?! Why would she be lying about that?! And what else is she hiding?!

Her doe eyes widened then, and she stared at Iris speechlessly. However, the shrine maiden refused to look at her anymore and had already turned away.

“Look, Pearl, someday…when the dust all clears… I hope you can get past this and accept me as your sister. I’m more than happy to accept you as mine. However, I have to go now. I –I promised Feenie I’d call him before he heads out to work. Take care.”

Pearl was still silently rooted in the same spot as Iris left and walked back into the temple, her mind reeling with what she’d unintentionally just discovered.

For whatever reason, Iris is lying about Mr. Nick! Even if she was telling the truth about still loving him! Surely she had to have known that making me think she was the reason he and Mystic Maya broke up would only make me despise her, so obviously, she must love him for real, even if it means alienating herself from us as the penalty?! I have no idea how to break the secrets behind those locks of hers, but I do know one thing for 100% fact now: Mr. Nick did not leave Mystic Maya because of Iris! Maybe… he never stopped loving my cousin, at all?! If only I knew the real reason why he did what he did it…

Pearl Fey and Luke Triton
Fey Manor
December 31, 2025, 4:10 PM

“Oh, Pearl…” Luke’s eyes were filled with compassion and sympathy as his girlfriend finished telling him her plight, which had been weighing so heavily upon her conscience all this time. Without another word, he pulled her into his arms, careful not to squish the tiny puppy sandwiched between them, and rested his chin atop her head. “I’m so sorry that you’ve been carrying this burden with you for so long.”

“I should have known something wasn’t right!” Her words were muffled against his chest as tears of chagrined frustration rolled down her cheeks. “Mr. Nick … he loved Mystic Maya so much, Luke! Even before they even got together, he risked everything for her – he would’ve sent an innocent person to prison if it had meant keeping my cousin safe! He ran across a burning bridge for her, even though it would’ve meant the end of his own life! I can’t believe I allowed myself to think that he would’ve thrown it all away, just like that! I should have known that he would never have betrayed his true love in such a while she was away on business in such a dismissive manner and so blithely given his heart away to another…”

“Pearl, I know how much Mr. Wright loved Maya. I witnessed evidence of that love with my own eyes when they came to England,” Luke reminded her, gently wiping away her tears with his thumb. “Remember when I told you how your ever-impulsive, act-first, think-later kinswoman risked her life to save Espella in Labyrinthia? He tried to fight off half a dozen knights trying to save her! Even in my own despair at the time, believing the Professor was dead – I had still never seen a man so grief-struck or so devastated as he was when he thought Maya was gone for good. I was only a child, going through my personal mourning, but even I could see how much he loved her, even back then.”

“Now you see why I can’t keep my silence any longer, don’t you Luke?” Pearl puled wretchedly. “The only reason Mystic Maya has tried to move on with Longines is that she believes that Mr. Nick left her for Iris but now I know that’s a lie! How can I possibly let her marry another man, one I know she doesn’t love – at least, not in the same way that she loved Mr. Nick – knowing what I do? Don’t you agree that I should tell her what I know?”

“No, Pearl.” Luke eyed her steadily. “I don’t support that idea, at all.”

“Y-you don’t?” She wailed plaintively, her eyes widening with disbelief. “I –I don’t understand! You just agreed with me that you, firsthand, could attest to how much Mr. Nick loved Mystic Maya! How can you possibly think that it’s alright for her to go through with this wedding, knowing that he lied to her about Iris?”

“Pearl, history cannot be refuted. There is no doubt in my mind that there was indeed a time when Mr. Wright loved your cousin very much, even enough to risk his life for her.” Luke shook his head sadly. “However, this still doesn’t change anything. The fact remains that even if he lied to her about the reason for leaving, and it wasn’t for Iris, the bottom line is that he still left her.”

“But it wasn’t for Iris though!”

“Be that as it may, I want you to contemplate the situation seriously.” Luke’s gaze remained kind and understanding, but there was a determined set to his jaw now. “You are proposing the risk of potentially getting Maya’s hopes up – all for nothing! As of right now, the full story remains unknown, so this information remains incomplete, do you understand that? Regardless of whether Mr. Wright left your cousin for another woman or not, the point is, you still don’t know why he did.”

“But Luke…”

“There’s one more very important factor you aren’t considering,” he continued sternly. “The other glaring fact that also remains is both Maya and Longines are household names. They’re both nationally and internationally famed celebrities. Ergo, I have little doubt that by this point, Mr. Wright has gotten wind of their betrothal – yet still has opted to do nothing about it!”

“Perhaps there’s a chance he doesn’t know yet!” She protested desperately. “Or maybe Mr. Nick doesn’t want to confess he still loves Mystic Maya, because he thinks she’s finally moved on!”

“Pearl, I hate to break this to you, but both Longines and Maya are world-renowned media darlings! The Professor is across the ocean, in England, and even he knew of the engagement before Maya rang him with the news!”

Luke placed his hands on her shoulders and looked her squarely in the eye.

“It is nigh impossible that Mr. Wright doesn’t know! I need you to truly comprehend what this ultimately means: it doesn’t matter if he is or isn’t with Iris and it makes no difference if he is single! What’s relevant is that he hasn’t done a single bloody thing to halt this engagement! He has not even tried to contact Maya, nor come rushing over here, begging her to break it off, which, if he still loved her so much, is exactly what he would do! It’s what any man would do – he would fight for the woman he loved! I know this … because it’s what I would do if I were him, and Maya was you!”

Upon hearing this, the girl silently took one of his hands and cradled it against her cheek, the look of love in her eyes requiring no words to be spoken aloud whatsoever. Encouraged, Luke continued.

“Pearl, believe me; I am not trying to be cruel. I care about Maya very much which is why I don’t think you should gamble with her happiness for something that sounds like such a long shot. What if you were to go ahead, tell her what you know, and your impetuous cousin calls off her wedding – and it’s all for naught? What would happen if it turns out that for whatever unknown reason, Mr. Wright tells her he still doesn’t want to be with her, and Maya’s heart gets broken all over again? Do you truly want to have that cross to bear?”

“No,” she whispered, knowing deep in her heart that her boyfriend was right. “It’s true, isn’t it? Maybe in the end… Mr. Nick just didn’t love her enough.”

“We can’t spend our lives playing the maybe or what-if game, Pearl. I know how much you love Maya, which is why you have stayed silent for this long; because you knew what a landmine this information could be. Sometimes in life, you must love someone enough to just stay silent, step back and have the chips fall where they may, and let whatever happens, happen.”

“OK.” Pearl nodded bravely, then leaned forward and kissed him softly. “If I ever did anything that ended up hurting Mystic Maya, I would never forgive myself. Thank you for preventing me from making a big mistake, Luke.”

“I want to thank you for finally unloading this burden off your shoulders, even somewhat, and trusting me enough to confide in me.” He tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear. “It was killing me, knowing that this whole week, behind that bright smile of yours, you’ve kept secrets from me.”

“Sometimes I can’t believe how well you know me, already.” Pearl shook her head ruefully. “I know Mystic Maya doesn’t even have a clue about just how woeful I’ve been, and she’s known me my entire life! Am I honestly such a transparently bad actress?”

“Not at all!” There was a mischievous glint in his eye. “I have little doubt that Maya has been too wrapped up in her engagement whirlwind of excitement to have been focusing on much else, including her daughter’s latent dejection this whole time. Had she not been, though, I’m certain she would’ve been tipped off, despite your Oscar-worthy performance, the same way I became privy to your turmoil.”

Smiling at the confused look on her face, Luke reached into his pocket and held up his magatama.

“What I can’t fathom is that I’ve been able to maintain any sort of worthwhile conversation with you all week!” He smirked. “Cor blimey, the rattling of the chains and psyche locks around your heart was so loud, they were driving me to near distraction!”

“Luke Triton! Can we agree, from this day forward, not to use our powers on one another?” Scowling slightly, Pearl grabbed the sides of her beau’s head and brought his face down to her level so he could see make out the mock indignation in her amethyst eyes. “After all, even the closest of couples should be allowed a little privacy now and then, right?!”

“As you wish, Princess Pearl!” He leaned over to kiss her nose. “You have my word as a gentleman never to pry, even unwittingly, into the mysteries inside that heart of yours again!”

“There’s not a lot of room left in there for much else,” she confessed, blushing slightly. “It’s mostly occupied with thoughts of you.”

She’s always saying these things! And it melts my heart, each and every time.

“Such a sweet-talker!” Luke laughed. “I’ve never met anyone like you in my whole life, Pearl Fey. I don’t know what to do with you!”

“Kiss me,” she said simply, giggling slightly.

And Luke did. He lifted her chin and kissed her mouth and swallowed her giggles whole. He felt her sunshine fill his lungs and her heartbeat quicken against his as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

“Since you used your magatama on me, mister man, you have to make it up to me!” Pearl told him playfully. “That means you have to now willingly tell me a secret.”

“I have already bared my entire heart and soul to you practically from day one! I am naught but an open book when it comes to you, I’m afraid.” Luke shook his head in mock despair. “As trite and boring as it may be, I’ve already told you everything there is to know.”

“Tell me a secret,” she repeated, in pure, unrelenting, stubborn Fey fashion.

“Okay,” Luke sighed resignedly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. But I wanted you to tell me a secret!”

“I’ve always loved you.”

Maya Fey and Longines Beaugosse
Kurain Village
December 31, 2025, 4:15 PM

At this point in her life, Maya prided herself on the fact that she’d handled more curveballs than any professional baseball player had, and with a somewhat exceptional level of panache! Ergo, the diviner genuinely and sincerely thought after all she’d endured, in the past 7 years alone, there was absolutely nothing left that could dumbfound her.

Take that evening’s proposed game plan, for example.

Her fiancé’s suggestion for their New Year’s Eve plans hadn’t sounded like anything out of the norm. Since Longines had amiably spent Christmas in Kurain, with her, Pearl, and Luke, eating a tofu turkey, it had only been fair to let him make their plans for the last night of the year. When he’d suggested spending the night’s festivities at the grand opening of his long-since-mentioned but never before met assistant’s new French restaurant, Maya hadn’t thought twice about it.

Her fiancé had graciously volunteered to come along with his aforementioned subordinate to Kurain in his limousine, pick her up, then bring her down to the city. He’d even offered to deliver Pearl and Luke to the Gumshoes’ party as well, as it was on the way. (The Kurain Master had already expressed her apologies to her old friends about not being able to attend the little gathering at their home, but had said she would drop by the next day to pick up her little girl and her other half on the way back to Kurain).

So here she was, standing solo at the entrance gates of the village, wondering if Pearl and Luke were going to be ready in time. Maya was the epitome of picture-perfect elegance as she stood there in wait, dressed in a violet, Pierre Cardin, chiffon slip dress that fell just past her knees with her long obsidian hair (which had since re-grown back to her waist) completely down and hanging in exquisitely styled, loosely curled waves tumbling down her back.

The spirit medium smiled in relief as she saw her cousin and her boyfriend coming in the distance, with little Feyt in Luke’s arms, just as the limousine pull-up. The driver exited the black, shiny vehicle and opened the door side door.

Longines smilingly stepped out with his normal, easygoing grace. He was as flawlessly coiffed and groomed as ever, with his halo of golden curls, no longer in need of extensions, tumbling just past his shoulders and looking like Tinsel Town perfection in his black Hermes suit.

“What’s cookin’, good-lookin’?” He winked, greeting Maya with a roguish wolf whistle. “I do believe you may set off the smoke alarms upon entry to the restaurant because you’ll be the hottest thing on the menu!”

“I wouldn’t sell myself so short if I were you, silly!” A high-pitched… and strangely recognizable man’s girlish titter came from behind the blond man. “Longines, you’re hardly a slouch in the looks department yourself, you know!”

At the sound of the other male voice, Maya’s eyes and mouth froze wide open, in an expression of stunned awe, and although she was staring straight at her smiling fiancé, she appeared not to notice him at all.

As though in a daze, her rounded orbs remained firmly transfixed on the eerily familiar form emerging from behind the billionaire, who was gazing right back at her, while shaking his torso in a most disturbing fashion!

“You!”  She gasped.

Maya Fey and Longines Beaugosse
Paris, France
December 24, 2025, 11:30 PM

“I don’t know what has more of a sparkle,” Longines told Maya as he poured champagne into her flute from the bar located in the back seat of the limousine. “That blingy engagement ring, or those beautiful, twinkling eyes of yours.”

“I’m sure it’s a close call!” She grinned, holding up her left hand to admire the twinkle of the knuckle-crushing pink diamond on her finger. “But since it’s such a gorgeous thing to be compared to that I’m going to say… Yes?”

“You already did!” He laughingly filled his own glass as well. “And I made sure all of Paris knew it, as well!”

“I hope by now Jacques has forgiven you for his back…” Maya winced. “I think he may be one person who may not share in the joyousness of the occasion!”

Longines decided to ignore the statement and instead clinked her glass against his own.

“A toast to the future Madame Beaugosse!” He declared, beaming at her. “May she never lose that indelible sparkle!”

“I’ll drink to that!”

The two paused to sip pleasurably at the ice-cold bubbly.

“Would now be a good time to go over the rules of engagement?” Longines asked at last.

Maya had known that this wasn’t your typical everyday betrothal and that there would be stipulations included but figured at this point, she was prepared for just about anything.

“Go ahead,” she smiled encouragingly. “I’m all ears.”

“Don’t sell yourself short!” He quipped, chuckling.

“Ha-ha, funnyman. State your terms.”

“OK, from this day on, I vow to give you everything and anything your heart desires: clothing, shoes, jewels, plane or show tickets… Whatever you or your little girl will ever want, without question, it’s yours,” he began. “In return, I ask for nothing too unreasonably crazy, save for your steadfast friendship, delightful companionship, and your ethereal self on my arm at any related corporate or charity event… As well as your complete discretion in doing whatever it is you please, if, at the end of the day, it is me you come home to.”

Maya knew full well what was being implied, and that the open marriage stipulation went both ways, even though Longines was too much of a gentleman to say as much out loud. They each would have the freedom to screw whomever they wanted, whenever they want, just as long as they came home and had dinner with one another by the end of the night. While she appreciated that he was allowing her such inconsequential liberties, one of the reasons she had initially decided to ally with the hair heir, which had since become a treasured friendship, was because she genuinely never wanted another man’s hands on her body, for as long as she lived! Consequently, she would remain a scrupulous wife, and she didn’t care if, on the flip side, that still meant Longines wouldn’t necessarily be a traditionally faithful husband.

Therefore, we’ll essentially be The Nun and The Man Whore – not that anybody would know what goes on behind our closed doors! It’s kind of funny … Nick’s one former ex-turned-current love, left the nunnery so she could be with him! Maya smiled grimly. Whereas his other ex, who was once told by an unworthy suitor that she looked like an escaped nun on the run, is getting married…but is essentially picking up Sister Iris’s celibate old habit! As Alanis Morissette sang: Isn’t it ironic, don’t you think?

“Fair enough,” she murmured, without even batting an eyelash. “Anything else?”

“Mes maisons sont vos maisons, and I want you to feel free to decorate them or do with them as you wish so that you’re comfortable and feel like it’s your place as well, whenever you and Pearl are visiting or vacationing in them, regardless of whether or not I’m there with you or am away tending to company matters. Keep in mind that my assistant always accompanied me on most of my business travels, but in the New Year, he will be busy running his restaurant. I’m hoping, so long as it doesn’t conflict with your business matters, that you would still be able and willing to be my regular traveling companion.”

“No objections thus far. Please continue.”

“Not a whole lot will change from what we have right now, to be honest; you don’t even really need to alter your living conditions. I travel a lot for work, as I know you do as well, but whenever we’re both in town, it would be nice to dine together on those evenings. All I ask is that you just let me know if you’re not going to be home, and I’ll give you the same courtesy.” He paused to refill both their glasses. “We can decide whether or not you wish to do a 50-50 split, living partially at Fey Manor and partially in my Hollywood mansion. Of course, it is also your call to pick which of your non-occupied bedrooms will be set up as my own separate chambers at Fey Manor for whenever I’m around, no different from when Luke occupies one of the guest rooms when he visits.”

“So far so good,” Maya replied blithely. “Nothing to stress about at this point, which cannot be figured out later, anyway.”

“Is there anything you would like to add?” Longines asked courteously. “I feel like I’m doing all the talking here!”

“I’m pretty laid back, as you’ve undoubtedly noticed.” She shrugged, then tapped her chin thoughtfully. “Hmmm…I always dreamed of being a June bride who married in my mother’s wedding dress, and I’d love for Sasha, the woman who trimmed my hair right before I met you, to be my hairstylist for the wedding. That would be about it, as far as my demands went, in this department.”

“I’m relieved to know I’m not marrying a Bridezilla!” He grinned. “I’m sure all those requests could be easily accommodated.”

She nodded in agreement.

“In public, of course, you will be my wife, and I will be your husband; in private, my guest, and vice versa.”

Here’s the part where things would possibly get awkward…

Maya took a big gulp of champagne before spitting out the $64,000 question that they both seemed to be dancing around, AKA the real reason he’d proposed/agreed to this marriage in the first place!

“Actually, there it’s just one thing I want to clarify…” she mumbled, unable to look him in the eye. “But while this marriage of companionship and mutual benefit is wholly suitable, and I assure you, most preferable… I’m just wondering how the whole private guest and separate chambers situation is going to be, ah… addressed when you feel the time has come to produce that legitimate heir you feel so inclined to have someday?”

“What’s this now, my darling fiancée?” Longines’ eyes were dancing with barely suppressed laughter as he regarded her pink-tinged cheeks. “Is that a delicate way of asking me if I will be able to perform my husbandly duties when the moment arises?”

“Um… Well, you did tell me rumors were swirling about you being a, um, confirmed bachelor since you were 30 and still unmarried when we first met.” For some inexplicable reason, the psychic was beyond mortified by his candor and found herself becoming flustered as she stumbled for the right words. “Ergo, I figured any extracurricular activities you decided to inconspicuously partake in would be…er, not necessarily with the female persuasion? Hence, I was sort of wondering exactly how that part of our marriage would work, ah, between you and me…?”

“Are you essentially asking me if I’m too gay to get it up upon command when the time comes, or if I’ll need to be picturing naked Hugh Jackman?” Longines threw back his head and let out a loud shout of laughter. “Is that what you think of me, my dear? That I should be afraid of fire extinguishers because I’m so flaming?”

“I never said that!” Maya gasped, then dissolved into giggles when she realized he was teasing. “But hey – these are your words, not mine!”

“Girl, have you looked in the mirror lately?” Longines wiped the tears of mirth from his eyes before fixing them on her with a fond, admiring expression. “You’re freaking hotter than Satan’s arse! Ergo, even if I happened to play for the other team, trust me: nobody’s that gay!”

Maya Fey and Longines Beaugosse
Kurain Village
December 31, 2025, 4:16 PM

Close your mouth, Maya Fey! The Kurain Master’s brain commanded sharply. You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to this engagement, even before the rules of it were outlined to you, in no uncertain detail!

Up until that point, Maya had thought that Longines Beaugosse, founder, and hair heir extraordinaire of You Blo Me, was the most outrageously flamboyant and outré man she would be encountering from this point onward.

Of course, she had also thought by the time she’d be pushing 30, she would be beyond being shocked to the point where her mouth soundlessly gaped open and closed, like a fish out of water!

As usual, it turns out I was wrong! You’d think I’d be used to this by now…

Longines’ assistant was no stranger to Maya whatsoever. Although she hadn’t set eyes on him in nearly 7 years, he hadn’t changed a bit!

The garish, orangey-yellow tightly coiffed spiraled mane, with matching curls as his beard, was still very much evident on the husky, muscular, and über effeminate man standing before her. However, a hot pink Santa Hat and matching sleeveless Mr. Claus outfit now replaced the customary bright pink chef hat and uniform!

OK, I didn’t think the sight of him could be more disturbia … way to go on a triple-perfect score of being wrong, Maya! Three strikes… I’m out!

Nevertheless, even all this time later, she had no problem immediately recognizing Jean Armstrong, her ex-boss and former owner of the now-defunct Trés Bien, otherwise known as the most god-awful French restaurant known to man!

“I was just about to introduce you to my longtime faithful assistant, Jean Armstrong, Maya…” Longines looked at her flummoxed expression strangely. “But it appears that you two already know each other…?”

Armstrong had been staring at the Master with a look of polite surprise, but appeared nowhere near as shocked at the sight of her, whatsoever!

“Maya Fey! Mon cherie mademoiselle!” He lunged at the petite woman with his brawny arms, planting two wet, sloppy kisses on both her cheeks. “I see the years have been kind to you! It has been so long!”

Ugh, not long enough…

Maya cringed inwardly at the dampness left behind on her face. Somehow, she managed to muster a strained smile, trying to obliterate the memories of the time the phony Frenchman had roped her unsuspecting behind into working for him as a waitress!

Flashback
January 2019

“Bien!” Armstrong grabbed the unsuspecting spirit medium by the arm as he yanked her into the restaurant. “Come wiz me. I will teach you everyz’ing I know!”

“N-Nick!” Maya yelped, eyes round with horror, right before she disappeared. “HEEEEEELP!”

I don’t know whether to laugh or feel bad for Maya… Phoenix thought, his shoulders shaking with silent, helpless laughter. Maybe I should do both…?

End flashback

Back to the present day…

Ugh, that was the longest day of forced labor of my life! The village leader barely suppressed a shudder. Not to mention that he forced me to wear that gaudy orange French maid uniform, that was so goddamn short, had I bent over in it, you would’ve been able to see my religion!

“It’s great that you’re already so …er, well acquainted with my fiancée, Jean!” Longines smiled, although looking slightly taken aback at his friend’s effusive greeting of the spirit medium. “I told you she was a beauty, didn’t I?”

“Oh, là là! Indeed, you did!” Armstrong clasped his hands to his chest and regarded Maya delightedly. “Oui, oui! C’est vrai! Elle est très belle! How blessed that the good Lord decided to bestow you with a set of titties at long last! Better late than never, am I right?”

Maya blinked several times, at a total loss of how to respond to such an indecorous observation about her anatomy.

Did he just freaking say what I think he did?!

“And how eez dat ‘andsome lawyer friend of yours?” Armstrong prattled on before the astonished woman could find any words to speak. “I cannot wait to play catch-up with you! I am most excited about tonight’s grand opening! I am sure you will love zi food!”

I’m sure I won’t! Maya thought petulantly, still trying to digest this most unpalatable blast from her past! What were the odds of this walking freak show (who, back in the day, had had zero qualms about making goo-goo eyes at Phoenix!), would now be … bosom buddies with her fiancé?!

Also, was she losing her mind, or was Armstrong batting his eyelashes in Longines’ direction?!

“It’s nice to see you again.” Maya dragged together the rags of her composure. “I must fully concur with your earlier observations of my fiancé. Of the two of us, Longines may very well be the prettier one!”

“I am biased, of course, when it comes to my cher ami, but I have to agree with you!” Armstrong let out a high-pitched titter, as he turned his unmistakably drooling face towards the handsome blond man. “After all, his name isn’t Beaugosse pour rien!”

“Stop it, Jean!” Longines blushed modestly and waved his hand at his friend. “You’re embarrassing me!”

“I only speak zee truth!” Armstrong insisted, putting a hand on Longines’ shoulder and leaving it lingering there a few moments longer than necessary as he looked at him with puppy-dog eyes. “Your last name means handsome boy for good reason indeed! Maya, you are such a fortunate femme! Do you have any idea how many people would kill to be in your shoes?”

The wistfulness of the last sentence did not escape Maya’s ears, although Longines seemed completely oblivious to the barely concealed meaningfulness in the screaming queen’s tone, as he was suddenly preoccupied with an email that had just come in on his cell phone.

Sacre bleu! The spirit medium thought in disbelief. This pouf has a flambé for my fiancé! How is it possible that Longines seems oblivious to this?!

Maya halted her train of thought in its tracks and mentally smacked herself in the head for such a ridiculous thought. After all, hadn’t both she and Phoenix been completely clueless to one another’s feelings for years before they had finally confessed? Even though the evidence of their affection for one another had been glaringly obvious to the rest of the entire world?!

Alrighty then! It seems I’m experiencing a homosexual version of my personal déjà vu …or would it be gay-ja vu in this case?!

Completely overlooking that Maya had never replied to his last question, Armstrong blissfully continued jabbering on about his new restaurant.

“Zeez restaurant is called Douce-Amère,” the pink-clad pouf babbled excitedly. “It eez quite different from the last one…”

Thank freakin’ God! Maya thought with relief. Does this mean that he isn’t the one doing the cooking this time?!

“Zi restaurant is my life,” Armstrong continued. “My cuisine is not for all. Some people, z’ey do not appreciate la haute cuisine. J’adore life! J’adore food! J’adore cooking! J’adore work!”

Ugh, that’s what he said about the last place!

“Douce-Amère, it’s French for bittersweet.” The burly man cast an unmistakably forlorn look at Longines, who was still busily sending a reply on his cell phone. “I was inspired by certain factors …in fact, mon cher Longines was une grande raison of what was going through my mind during the name selection, you see…”

Stevie Wonder could see, you subtle as a Mack truck, overly besotted … cream puff!

Maya was torn between laughter and pity at the Frenchman’s completely blatant ardor for the man she was betrothed to, as she was certainly no stranger to pining for someone that didn’t appear to share her affections!

At the same time, Armstrong’s cell phone suddenly started to ring, and he excused himself to go answer it as he stepped away a few yards, just as Pearl and Luke finally approached the trio.

“Longines!” She hissed at her fiancé, beckoning him over to her. “May I speak to you for a moment, please?!”

“Sure, Maya.” The billionaire put away his phone and smiled in greeting the teenagers before walking over to her. The necromancer waved hello to her the teen couple before not-so-discreetly pulling her fiancé’s arm, so that they moved a few feet away, hopefully somewhat out of earshot from the others.

“This man…” The psychic’s face and tone were incredulous as she stared at the blond man. “He’s been your assistant all this time?!”

“Yes, for the past two years or so, why?” A perplexed frown marred Longines’ smooth brow. “Is there a problem, sweetie?”

“Well for one thing, are you sure nothing’s ever gone missing?” She demanded, as she nervously clutched her evening bag closer to her. “This man was a documented kleptomaniac with a massive debt problem!”

“Oh, I already knew all about that!” Longines replied airily, not sounding in the least concerned. “He did some extensive pharmacological, cognitive, and dialectical behavioral therapy after he spent some time behind bars, and he has paid his debt to society as well as re-paid his debt to that awful loan shark who had him by the short and curlies! Part of his release was based on several hundred hours of community service, so he was helping out at one of my charity foundations, and he did such a great job with the fundraising that I decided to hire him directly as soon as his hours were done. He’s been such a dear friend ever since!”

“A friend, you say?” She raised an eyebrow at that one. “Are you sure that’s all he’s ever been?”

“Of course, that’s all he’s been!” He gawked at her blankly. “Just what are you trying to imply here?”

Maya didn’t reply, just continued to stare at him, and a slight blush crept along the billionaire’s tanned cheeks.

“Oh my God, Maya Fey! What a dirty, suspicious little mind you have!” Longines legitimately seemed somewhat offended. “Naturally, I have never had any sort of dalliance with somebody that is a paid staff member of mine! I didn’t get to be a tycoon by foolishly dipping my pen into the company ink!”

“Really? Not even if it’s really obvious that he wants you to dip your pen into any willing and available part of him?” Maya flushed as she realized how crass that sounded. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to sound crude, but surely you’ve noticed he shamelessly hits on you?!”

“You’re so silly!” Longines laughed gaily, waving away her observation with his hand. “Jean is just flirtatious – he hits on everyone! He can’t help it – he’s French, like me! We’re a flirty lot! It’s what we do!”

As if on cue, Armstrong ended his phone call, and turned to look at Luke and Pearl, his gaze affixed on the British gentleman-in-training with unabashed interest.

“Oh, what a precious little puppy!” He burbled cheerfully, clasping his hands together in delight as he looked at the two wide-eyed teens. “So, you must be Maya’s little cousin Pearl! And you, tasty little morsel… Must be the better half! It’s such a pleasure to meet you! It’s Lucas, right?”

“Er, yes, but I prefer to be called Luke,” the gobsmacked Englishman replied politely, hesitantly offering his hand to shake. “It’s nice to meet you, too, Mister…?”

“No need to be so formal!” Leaning forward, Armstrong planted a loud juicy smack on each of the utterly unprepared Luke Triton’s cheeks. “No Mister, you can just call me Jean! I’ve always had a soft spot for z’e younger boys, you know! Especially ones with such delicious accents!”

Luke looked like he’d slightly thrown up in his own mouth.

Armstrong leered at Luke for another lingering moment, before turning to Pearl.

“Make sure you keep a tight rein on that fine behind, girlfriend! What a lucky little thing you are!”

“Erm, I’m the lucky one, really,” Luke insisted gallantly, wrapping an arm around his girlfriend’s shoulders, and essentially putting her between him and Armstrong as a makeshift human shield. “As you can see, good looks run rampant in the Fey family, heh, heh.”

“Oh, I suppose your petite copine is a pretty sort,” Armstrong sniffed, knowing a rebuke when he heard one, but flashing a jaunty wink at Luke nonetheless. “If you actually like that rosebud-lipped, doe-eyed sort of thing…”

“I truly do!” Luke’s tone was now as strained as his smile. “I’ve always been a lover of pretty girls! My whole, entire life, honestly!”

“I’m sure they love you too, English Muffin!” Armstrong trilled. “I mean, just look at you! You’re gorgeous!”

“Maybe we should get going,” Maya cut in anxiously before the over-the-top wannabe Frenchman possibly scarred her daughter’s boyfriend for life! “Kids, do you have everything you need for overnight?”

Pearl and Luke nodded mutely, completely at a loss for words.

This is what my life has become?! Pearl silently screamed. I made one horrible comment a few months ago about how if Mystic Maya were to marry Longines, I would be getting a second mommy, and now this guy comes along, as the third creepy maternal figure?! What did I ever do to wind up with this 2-for-1 package from hell?!

Maya Fey and Longines Beaugosse
Douce-Amère Restaurant
January 1, 2026, 12:15 AM

She hadn’t been able to stand to be in there another moment.

Desperately needing some fresh air, Maya stepped outside on the restaurant patio, waving away the pungent smell of cigarette smoke as she joined the throng of smokers who were puffing away on their cancer sticks, making a bluish-grey opaque cloud form around their heads, completely negating her need to come out there.

Fine, so it’s not fresh. Well, at least it’s semi-fresh. Well, kind of…outdoorsy… Maya coughed as a stream of smoke blew her way. OK fine, at least it’s air!

At least it was better than in there at the party, where, on a night out with her fiancé, she had been made to feel like the odd man out, by his disgustingly inappropriate, clinging vine of an enamored assistant!

Who, incidentally, hasn’t upped his game in the kitchen whatsoever in the past near-decade! He should have stuck with his mondo grosso aromatherapy oils!

Longines had apologized to her profusely for the stomach-lurching, so-called gourmet fare, which made the previous food that Armstrong had served at Trés Bien seem deliciously edible in comparison! He’d even promised to take her out for a burger before the night was over, as atonement!

Historically, it seemed the combination of Maya Fey + Longines Beaugosse + French Cuisine = doomed, abysmal, epic fail, regardless of the continent they were on!

Thus far, however, Longines had been unable to make good on his promise, because Armstrong had insisted on keeping Maya’s fiancé glued to his side while he had mingled amongst the other party guests, possessively clutching his arm in a death grip while he steered him about, as though the hair tycoon were his date!

Longines, of course, had been too gracious to say anything much without causing a scene and had repeatedly, and apologetically, looked over at her and mouthed, “We’re leaving soon!”

The last time had been about an hour and a half ago! As a result, Maya was left to fend for herself all night, in a roomful of people she didn’t even know, (and desperately wishing she’d gone ahead to the Gumshoes instead!) while feeling like she was an unwanted third wheel.

Despite her misery, the spirit medium honestly found she couldn’t even be entirely angry with Armstrong for acting the way he was. Unrequited love sucked, she knew this firsthand, and she also understood that the man was simply acting out because he suddenly had to share Longines’ affections and attention with somebody else now, after having had him to himself, for so long.

How could Maya possibly judge him, without seeming like a complete hypocrite, when nearly 7 years ago, she had been guilty of such equally abhorrent behavior herself?

I wanted things that I thought would never be mine and I had not yet learned how to deal with that. Armstrong is merely a fatter, hairier, bitchier version of me, circa 2019.

On her 21^st birthday at The Borscht Bowl, Maya was beyond mortified to admit that she’d behaved like an absolute green-eyed monster towards the unassuming Tiffany, the sexpot waitress who’d worked there. The sexy blonde had had her eye on Phoenix, and had innocently assumed that he was unattached at the time, which technically, up until that night, he very well had been! However, that still hadn’t stopped the diviner from acting like a catty, jealous, shrew towards the other woman for the entire night, until things between the couple had finally come to a glaring head.

“There you are!” Longines exclaimed, bursting out the side door and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “I’ve been looking all over for you! You took off right after the clock struck midnight, and I couldn’t even kiss my fiancée Happy New Year!” Leaning over, he planted a light kiss on her cheek.

“I noted that your lips were occupied when the New Year was being rung in, my dear.” The necromancer smiled faintly, planting a chaste peck on his cheek in return. “I didn’t want to get in the way.”

“Ugh, you saw that?!” Longines groaned with embarrassment and dragged a hand down his face. “I swear to you, Maya I don’t know what got into Jean tonight – I mean aside from over a half-dozen SUCK, BANG & BLOW cocktails! He’s never acted in such a manner before – but the minute midnight hit, he just grabbed my face and planted one right on me before I could do anything about it!”

“I did see it,” she admitted, her lips twisting into a wry smile. “But I can’t say I even fault him too much. I tried to hint at it earlier, up in Kurain, when I said he was hitting on you and you dismissed his actions as mere Frenchman flirtatiousness. There’s more to it than that. He’s acting out because he’s desperate and terrified about losing you.”

“Losing me?!” Longines gaped at her comically. “Maya what the hell are you talking about?!”

“Longines.” Maya looked at him earnestly. “I thought you were such a bright man, yet you continue to astound me by still insisting that you are truly this blind? Even now, you’re going to claim to be wholly unaware of the fact that Jean Armstrong is madly, hopelessly, perilously in love with you?”

“Are you gonna be all silly about this, again?” Longines demanded, shaking his head. “Jean’s just a little bit too much to drink probably stemmed from his nerves about the opening night of his restaurant, that’s all. You’re reading way too much into this!”

“A French restaurant with a name that translates as bittersweet! He essentially declared he called it that with you in mind. No, I’m not being silly, dear friend.” Her voice was soft. “He’s in love with you. Trust me on this one. I can tell by the way he looks at you.”

“Oh?” Longines raised a skeptical eyebrow. “And how exactly does he do that?”

Maya closed her eyes and took a deep breath as she drew upon a distant memory from another lifetime ago, pausing for a moment to swallow back the searing pain that accompanied it before she found the ability to answer.

“The way the moon looks at the sun,” she explained, her voice quivering. “Like for the first time in his life, he feels warm.”

Longines stared at her, wide-eyed and completely speechless as the weight of her words sunk in.

“I know that look,” Maya whispered, as tears filled her eyes. “I know it because that’s how Nick used to look at me.”

“I’m so sorry, Maya.” His blue eyes were awash with sympathy as he pulled her into a tight hug. “I’ve been a terrible fiancé for keeping you here this long, alone with your pained thoughts when I should have been at your side and feeding you that burger I promised you! Nevertheless, I am a man of my word – let’s get out of here. I’ll take you to this great burgers-only diner, and then we’re gonna check out this terrific after-hours club that has dancing till dawn…”

“You go on ahead.” She shook her head. “I swear, I’m not angry at either of you for the way your assistant behaved tonight, but I’m kind of in party pooper mode tonight and I don’t want to drag everyone down with me. I – I just want to go home.”

“Home?” He looked astonished. “Dreamheart, I don’t want to go anywhere without you!”

“I insist that you do, though. It’s fine!” She smiled tiredly. “I’m a big girl. I’ll be alright on my own.”

“But you said you were going to go see your friend Gumshoe tomorrow while picking up Luke and Pearl on the way back to Kurain? Your wanting to go home tonight makes no sense! At least let me book you a hotel room down here in the city, and then you can just head over to your friend’s place and pick up your daughter and go home tomorrow, instead of making a double trip for nothing.”

“Longines, please, let me be.” The spirit medium put a placating hand on his arm. “Maybe I’ve had too much to drink tonight, or I’m just tired, but regardless, whatever it is, I know it’s going to make me be really bad company tonight. I refuse to do that to you. The only thing that’ll snap me out of this funk is just going home, being alone, and sleeping in my own bed. I’ll call a cab. It’s no big deal.”

Seeing that his betrothed was in no mood to be argued was, the blond man sighed in resignation, then leaned over and kissed her on the forehead.

“Fine, but there’s no way I am letting you take a taxi back to Kurain. I’m going to jump into a cab with some friends and had to that all-night club, and then probably crash either at a hotel down here in LA, or head back to my mansion. In the meantime, though, Beauregard, my limo driver is on call, and just around the corner. I called him right before I came out to see you. At least let me ensure you get home safely if nothing else.”

“Thank you,” she replied quietly, leaning over, and kissing him on the cheek. “You’re such a sweetheart. Your assistant is right, you know. I am a lucky girl. I’ll give you a call tomorrow.”

Fifteen minutes later, the spirit medium was sitting comfortably in the luxury limousine, headed homeward bound. She leaned her head back against the plush seat and closed her eyes.

Maya wasn’t quite sure if it had been Armstrong’s arduous actions that she’d witnessed that night that had triggered her overly emotional state, or if she could blame it all on the fact that it was still the holiday season, which was making her feel so nostalgic for her ex and the loved they’d once shared.

Regardless of what it was, and the fact that she was now engaged to a man who dulled a lot of her pain, and allowed her to feel some sort of happiness again, something tonight had triggered a sleeping beast within. And this cruel beast had made her feel more melancholic and more alone than she had in a very, very long time.

Loneliness, indeed, can be a relentless predator that consumes every shred of hope and happiness within you. It devours any remnants of joy, leaving behind a hollow shell filled with despair and fading memories. It clutches your heart tightly, draining the life force that once flowed through your veins. Its insatiable hunger denies you the warmth of loving embraces and the comfort of a compassionate shoulder to lean on. Instead, it delights in the touch of icy fingertips, momentarily drawing near and then vanishing, leaving you abandoned once again. This beast, this loneliness, is a formidable force that instills fear, for it seems beyond your control.

Maya sighed as she stared out the window. Even though she’d made the conscious decision to release her ex-lover from her heart and mind during her fateful visit to Franziska, there were still times when she missed Phoenix Wright so much, it hurt.

This was one of those times.

In French, they say “tu me manques,” which translates to “you are missing from me.” This phrase captures the essence of how I feel about you. Like a vital limb, an organ, or even blood, you were an integral part of me. You were essential to my very existence, and I find it incredibly difficult to function without you. Things can never be the same. Despite the pain you caused me, I cannot pretend to be a cold, heartless being when it comes to you. I still miss you deeply. It’s as if one moment you were here, a significant presence in my life for eight long years, not only as my lover but also as my hero, confidante, and the best friend I have ever known. Now, you’re simply gone. Even if my love for you has transformed into hatred, I would still feel your absence keenly, Nick. And for the record, I loved the fuck out of you.